Spirits Gone Wild
by monkeymaiden14
Summary: Every ten years, the spirits of the world get a week long vacation aboard the Flying Dutchman. This is Jack's first vacation and the guardians enlist the help of Mother Nature and the love Guru Cupid on Operation eliminate the UST. But, when the Groundhog starts wooing, it takes the help of prank masters Hallow and April Fool to keep their new cohort from the clutches of the Hog.
1. Vacation?

"Vacation?" asked Jamie, the kids taking a break from their snowball fight as refreshments had been brought out by Jamie's Mother, Sophie munching on a cookie while they listened to Jack's news update.

"Apparently every ten years or so the spirits of the world all get together for a week long vacation." Shrugged Jack, perched on the fence, his usual hoodie replaced by a white and blue striped sweater, the old blue hoodie having met it's demise a month ago after a scuffle in the Warren ripped it clean in half. "You should have seen Tooth's face when I told her I always skipped it..."

_ "What?!" Jack winced at the fairy's shriek, even Bunny flattening his ears with a his of pain. "What do you mean you've never taken a vacation?!" Jack shrugged, freezing an Elf as it tried to pilfer one of his favorite cookies._

_ "I mean I've never taken a vacation. What's the point? I mean, I AM the guardian of Fun. Why bother?"_

_ "Frostbite has a point." Snorted Aster, painting a green egg with light blue stripes. "Since when does the clown actually work? He said it himself, snowballs and fun times."_

_ "Hey!" huffed Jack. "Do you have ANY idea how hard it is to make the perfect snowfall? It has to be just wet enough to pack, but light enough to shovel, hard enough to build with and soft enough not to break bones in a snowball fight, while STILL making it shimmer, and trying to prevent black ice on roads is NO picnic Kangaroo."_

_ "Riiight." Drawled Aster, returning to his work. North clapped him hard on the back, chuckling._

_ "Then first time for everything, ja?" he boomed merrily. "We cruise through Hawaii!"_

_ "Pass." Said Jack. "I don't do hot weather."_

_ "It's important you go!" said Tooth. "ALL the guardians have to attend! We use the time to get updates of gossip and information from the grape vine, and know what's going on with which countries and about the children from around the world! You NEED to show up!"_

_ "Why? Nobody cared before." Jack winced at the pained look in Tooth and North's eyes. "Look, I didn't mean it like that. It's just nobody really cared if I showed up or not. Why is it so different now?"_

_ "Because very few know a face for new guardian!" said North. "Must meet spirits! Socialize! Form bonds!" Jack couldn't help but notice the jolly Russian pointedly stared at Aster with that statement._

_ "Bonds?" he asked, wishing for his Father figure to elaborate._

_ "Friendship, maybe a little romance if Cupid has anything to say about it." said Tooth. "Oh, and you simply MUST meet Hallow and April Fool! You'd get along so well!" Aster looked mortified._

_ "Ya got a bloody bunch of roos loose in the upper paddock Tooth!" he scoffed. "Frostbite associating with the likes of those little dills will NOT end well. Ya may as well set him up with that greasy root rat Groundhog!" Jack laughed at Aster's panic, snickering at the venomous glare the grey Pooka shot his way._

_ "Oh, you're so melodramatic Bunny!" sighed Tooth. "Groundhog isn't THAT bad."_

_ "What's a root rat?"_

_ "Come! We must pack!" declared North, picking up Jack by his hood. Jack groaned, Tooth chattering a mile a minute about family pictures and water polo (whatever that was) as North dragged him off, laughing happily. Aster sent them an annoyed glare, but Jack couldn't help but feel that, for once, he wasn't the target…_

"Why did you skip it?" asked Cupcake. "You are the guardian of FUN. Vacations are fun!" Jack shrugged.

"Never saw the point." He said. "Besides, I was to busy figuring things out to really care about the time, and most of the spirits didn't seem too fond of me. Instead I used the time to try and break into North's workshop. By the way, I don't recommend trying. Never got past the yetis, and they pack a punch."

"But…a Vacation!" said Jamie.

"Well, this year I don't get a choice in the matter." Snorted Jack. He cleared his throat and imitated a Russian accent. "Since I'm guardian blah, blah, blah appearances yak, yak, yak make good impression yakity yak." The children giggled, making Jack smile. This is what he was all about, bringing joy to the children. Of course, the fact they can SEE him only sweetened the deal.

"Where are you vacationing anyway?" asked Monty shyly.

"Hawaiian Cruise." Said Jack. "Some sort of magic control keeps everyone at a good external temperature. Not sure how that works. Maybe I can steal the technology to harass the Kangaroo."

"Easter Bunny! Hop, hop, hop!" giggled Sophie, clapping, the children paling and snickering at the same time.

"That's right Soph!" said Jack. "Oh man, I wish you could have seen the masterpiece I pulled this morning. Not going to tell you how I got them, but it will take Cottontail FOREVER to get rid of all those tennis balls!" Jack laughed and lost his balance, but instead of biting it at the base of the fence, he hit something fluffy and furry with a pounding heart beat, evil intent practically radiating off it. He looked up to see infuriated green eyes staring down at him, a low growl in the bunny's chest. Smiling cheekily, he poked Aster's nose.

"Well if it isn't the grumpy old Easter Kangaroo." He snickered. "Impressive. Four hours and forty two minutes. Thought it would take at least eight hours to get rid of all those tennis balls." Aster ground his teeth together, obviously holding in choice words for the sake of the kids. While the two exchanged aggressive, somewhat derogatory banter, the kids stared worriedly at the two. Well, except for Cupcake and Pippa, who were looking on with mild amusement and extreme exasperation. They sighed loudly, getting half of the spirit's attention.

"Oh my GOD the UST is suffocating. Hurry up and kiss already!" Groaned Cupcake, Pippa nodding in agreement. The rest of the children (save for Sophie) gasped, looking at the two guardians who, distracted by the outburst were both looking on in confusion.

"WHAT?!" Sputtered Jack, Aster's ears going flat as his eye twitched. "What the Hell is UST?!"

"Unresolved sexual tension." Jack sputtered, this time actually falling off the fence. Aster grabbed him by the hood and hoisted him in the air.

"As much as I'd LOVE to beat the living daylights out of ya, North wants you at the pole." Huffed Aster. "Fellas." A yeti, somehow hidden behind the fence, popped up with a familiar red sack, Bunny moving to shove Jack inside. With a grunt, he tore loose from Aster and laughed, the yeti yelling in gibberish.

"Not on yer nelly mate." Snickered Jack, doing a horrible impression of an Australian accent as he landed on a power line. "The sack won't work this time~"

"Get yer skinny arse back here ya bloody show pony!" Jack laughed, the Pooka chasing after him. "North told me to drag yer frosty butt to the pole, and damn it yer going to the pole!"

"Is that a challenge, Crocodile Bundee?"

"Ya don't want to race a Rabbit mate." The yeti face palmed, the children laughing as the Easter Bunny chased Jack, Bunny having the advantage of speed, while Jack was smaller and more agile in the snow. Jack was laughing all the way, while Bunny threatened him from below. Finally, the Pooka had enough. He hid, waiting for Jack. He didn't have to wait long. Jack touched down, wondering where the Bunny had gone. Aster readied the sack, and charged. Jack jumped, but the sack came down over his head, Aster scooping him up and tying the strings shut. The kids giggled as the VERY annoyed Easter Bunny handed the yeti the squirming sack. The yeti made a garbled noise and flung a portal, throwing Jack through before hopping in himself. The children waved sheepishly as the portal closed. Bunny shot Pippa and Cupcake a barbed look.

"Yer too young to even THINK along those lines." He snorted, tapping his foot and summoning a portal. The hole closed up as Bunny disappeared, Sophie smiling away.

"Bye-Bye Easter Bunny~" she giggled, waving a hand with her hot cocoa in another. The boys looked at Pippa and Cupcake.

"UST?" asked Monty. "Really?"

"OH yeah." Snickered Pippa. "Why else would Jack pick on him all the time? And if Bunny didn't like him, you think he would chase him down for a stupid nickname and…tennis ball prank. Damn, I wish I could have seen that." Suddenly a little portal opened up, an Christmas elf dragging an envelope behind him. Written in messy blue ink was the words 'From Jack'. Jamie opened the envelope and choked. The Warren was lost under a sea of rainbow tennis balls, egglets undamaged but stuck in the mess, the egg golems panicking as they tried to waddle through, Bunny hopping on top of he stone eggs and trees, chasing after a laughing Jack. On the back was a tiny note.

_Prank Kangaroo thirty nine: Success._

"Like little boys pulling pigtails." Sighed Cupcake.

"Why would anyone want to pull a pig's tail?" asked Jamie. "They smell worse than a wet yeti!" Pippa and Cupcake sighed.

"Boys."


	2. The Situation

"Oh my God…" Jack stared wide eyed at the cruise ship in front of him, North chuckling as he slapped a wide brimmed hat on the winter spirit. _The Flying Dutchman_ was like NONE of the stories, a rickety old death trap. It was a world class cruise liner, it's ghostly crew humming happily and welcoming the spirits on vacation. Jack jumped as a black band was secured to his wrist, and nearly screamed as suddenly the hot, dry air turned moist and cool. He stared dumbly at his wrist, the black band like a strange second skin.

"Cool…" he chuckled, before mentally slapping himself for the pun. He coughed as North clapped a hand on his back, the crew taking their luggage and escorting them up the gangplank and to their respective rooms. Bunny couldn't help but watch in amusement as Jack whipped his head around, staring in wonder at the pristine white walls, regal carpets and swarms upon swarms of new faces. Really, the imp looked a bit overwhelmed.

"See Jack, this s going to be fun!" chattered Tooth, fluttering about as the guardians moved forward. "We'll play in the pool, sing some Karaoke-"

"Remind me to get some ear plugs." Snorted Aster. The ghosts led them through the halls, up a flight of stairs and finally to their rooms. Jack was handed a room key with the number 005 as a ghost opened the Door to North's suite. The entire room was Christmas themed, as if someone had taken a cut out of Santoff Claussen and deposited it on the ship. A roaring fire place was in the corner by huge windows. Chuckling North took his room key and entered.

"Meet at pool, ja?" Tooth nodded as the ghost shut the door and moved to the next room. Inside was a royal blue and gold Arabian set up, in lieu of a bed a mere pile of different sized pillows, a similar den to North's down a few steps, again with a big window. Sandy silently thanked the ghost and retreated to get settled. The next door, room 003, was definitely Tooth's with it's nest like bed and multitudes of colors. There were rainbow curtains, the entire wall leading out to sea a big set of windows, and a matching fire place and chairs in the lowered den like North and Sandy. Room 004 was opened to reveal grassy floor, the furniture made of carved wood or stone. Moss somehow clung to the walls and stones, a large circular window with a large sitting space in place of the sill. The lowered den had the similar bench idea, the soft benches round the fire place, curving with the walls. Finally the ghost opened up room 005.

"Wow…" The room had the same layout as the others, but everything in the room was a hue of blue, white or silver. The bed was big, covered by a fluffy white duvet set that reminded him of fresh snow. The carpet was dark blue with intricate frost patterns, the walls a very light blue with snowflakes. The room had a modern feel , and a window as big as Tooth's with navy blue curtains trimmed with silver. He turned as the door clicked, the ghost shutting him in. Jack took a moment to enjoy the room, flopping on the bed before opening his suitcase. North wanted to meet at the pool, so he had to have some kind of swim trunks in the case. Tooth said she spent hours packing his things in advance. His fingers brushed the smooth swimsuit fabric and he smiled, pulling it out. He stared at the garments for a moment before Tooth zoomed in, the ghost snatching back his skeleton (Pun not intended) key from the hyperactive fairy.

"Come on, get changed!" he said, hands on her hips. Jack took a moment to stare in shock at featherless Tooth, save for the plumage on her head, wearing instead a peacock patterned bikini. Jack looked back at what she packed and shook his head.

"NOT happening." He shivered at the ominous hum of thousands of wings, an army of BabyTeeth forming behind her. Jack gulped as they slowly made their way forward, shutting the door behind them. The crew members jumped as the sound of a violent fight broke out behind the doors, the squeaks of little fairies and yells of a winter spirit and a bigger fairy centering around 'it'. Wordlessly it was agreed upon to ignore it, walking along as they had before, trying to tune out the squeaks, yells and screams.

_ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROT-ROTG_

Aster glared at the dripping Cossack in front of him, blocking his view of the receding coast line and light as he tried to sketch, contently relaxing poolside with carrot juice with a shot of vodka, enjoying the relative peace before everybody began hitting the bar.

"Not getting in the pool mate." He snorted. "Now move yer arse. Yer blocking my subject." North chuckled, seemingly unbothered by the fact plenty were staring at his gingerbread man print swim trunks and candy cane striped t-shirt.

"Come Bunny!" insisted North. "What the point of pool if one does not enjoy?"

"I AM enjoying myself." Huffed the Pooka. "Dry, warm and NOT getting my tail frozen by Frostbite!" Sandy, sitting on a sand beach chair sipping some kind of golden drink flashed a snowflake, a tooth and a question mark above his head.

"Yes, where Jack and Tooth?" puzzled North. Sandy dropped his cup, sand going wild above his head as he stared behind North.

"What's got yer sand in a twist?" asked Aster as North turned. Tooth was flying towards them, dragging an also flying Jack behind her, his cheeks violet with embarrassment. North chuckled, saying something in Russian as Aster looked around him. He congratulated himself for keeping his ears still and face expressionless. Tooth had, by some miracle, forced Jack into tight navy blue denim short shorts and an equally tight baby blue tank top with narrow straps and silver and white snowflakes made of swim suit material. Aster bit back a low growl as a few spirits stared at Jack, evaluating him and a few undressing him with their eyes. Not that it was difficult. The little number Tooth picked out left very little to the imagination, revealing miles of snow white skin, clinging to the eternal teen's slim figure and revealing his supple legs and-

_HOLD IT! Pull yerself together Aster!_ The Pooka quickly took a healthy swing of his drink, thankfully unnoticed by Jack as Tooth paraded him about.

"You look so CUTE!" she squealed, clapping happily as her mini fairies swooned. Jack squirmed uncomfortably, the dark violet getting a bit deeper on his cheeks. Tooth turned to Bunny with a knowing smirk. _That evil little sheila…_

"So?" she said. "How does he look?" Sandy nodded and gave a thumbs up. North smiled and pulled out a short sleeved, thin hoodie and tossed it at Jack.

"Look good, but more comfortable, ja?" Jack nodded gratefully and pulled it on, the hoodie still tight but not nearly as much as the swim top and the hood provided much more familiarity to the winter spirit. Jack finally broke away from Tooth and slipped onto the beach chair next to Bunny.

"Is she ALWAYS like this?" sighed Jack.

"Only when she's got a new fashion victim." Snorted Aster, sneaking a glance at Jack. His ears went flat as he examined the boy, following the contours of his body and glimmering, frosty skin-

_Damn it! SHUT UP BRAIN!_

Jack relaxed into the chair, hands behind his head. He had just closed his eyes when a bottle hit him upside the head.

"Ow! What the Hell Kangaroo?!" Jack looked at the sunscreen bottle in his hands, then to the Pooka.

"I'm not dealing with ya when yer red as a bloody lobster ya dill." Snorted Aster. "Now shut yer gob and put it on." Jack smiled devilishly, leaning over to the Pooka.

"Awe, is Cotton tail WORRIED about little old me?" Aster flicked him in the forehead, sending him back, with a growl.

"Ya got roos loose in the top paddock." He snorted. Jack rolled his eyes and popped the cap on the sunscreen. Aster didn't miss a few practically drooling as Jack put a little dot of sunscreen on his thigh and rubbed it in obliviously. He paused a moment, then proceeded to wriggle out of his cover. Aster sputtered, choking a bit on his drink.

"O-Oi! What are ya-"

"In case I take it off later." Shrugged Jack. "Hey, can you get my back?" Oh, how Aster wanted to. But, sadly, the fur on his paws would pick it up like a matted sponge.

"Fur, mate." He said, moving a paw. "That stuff ain't bunny friendly." Jack, taking the refusal as I was, a polite pass, and proceeded to attempt to reach his back, and surprisingly was met with success. Bunny mentally hit himself for enjoying his flexibility when a squeak came from the other side of the pool. His eyes narrowed as the two biggest annoyances (at least in his book) of the spirit world sent spirits careening on a disguised slip and slide into the pool, laughing maniacally all the while. Jack looked on with curiosity. North lumbered over, talking with Tooth, when his foot hit the slip and slide, sending him down the deck and into the pool. Jack cracked up, seeing North resurface with a look of shock on his face. Apparently April Fool and Hallow heard, because they were staring intently in their direction, a grin spreading on both the prankster's faces.

_Oh HELL no._ Aster pointedly put his sketch book down, downed his drink and got up, standing between Jack and Hallow and Fool's gaze.

"Oh come on Bun-Bun, you have to admit that WAS funny." Giggled Jack.

"Annoying, but not the point." Huffed Aster. "Come on. Sooner or later ya got to meet other spirits, so lets go. Lets deal with it while I still have the patience to deal with ya."

"Hey!" said Jack, jumping up and floating at eye level with Aster.

Tooth fluttered over North, Sandy dipping his shades as the two stared each other down.

"MiM they're in it deep!" sighed Tooth, cocking her head. "The sexual tension is so thick you can almost SEE it! Why can't they hurry up and screw each other's brains out already?!"

"Love needs to grow and blossom on it's own darling, or it won't survive in the world." A red haired male with white wings sat on the edge of the pool, a red cocktail with a little heart shaped strawberry dunked in chocolate impaled on the edge in his hand.

"CUPID!" Tooth glommed the cherub, the other spirit expertly saving his beverage from a tumble as Tooth hugged him and squealed. Cupid patted her shoulder.

"Lovely to see you too Tooth darling." He said, smiling. "Now, what makes you so impatient about love? Tell the love guru all about it."

"Jack Frost and Bunny!" she sighed. "Jack's our new Guardian, and he and Bunny are ALWAYS fighting but it's so OBVIOUS they want each other! I mean, LOOK!" Cupid stared at the bickering pair a moment before smiling.

"Ah, Jack Frost…" he chuckled. "I must remember to thank him. Winter, after all IS the season of love. The moonlit walks in the sparkling snow, ice skating, cuddled together in front of the fire, slipping on the ice and colliding with your soul mate; ah, sweet l'amore."

"Yeah, but what about them?!" asked Tooth. "It's so frustrating!" Cupid took a sip of his drink and his red eyes began to glow with a pink aura.

"Well, you ARE correct in one aspect." Said Cupid. "There IS a problem. Bunnymund KNOWS he's in love with Frost, but is too stubborn to admit it. Jack, on the other hand, is also attracted to the fur ball, but doesn't realize he's in love. Idiots."

"What do we do?!" fretted Tooth. "I mean…it's love, Cupid! LOVE! And Aster needs someone to love and Jack needs to BE loved, and they are NOT making any progress! Augh! Those two…they're more frustrating than the Baby Teeth after raiding North's kitchen for those wretched, evil, sugary, sinfully delicious, tooth-rotting abominations he calls cookies!" Cupid patted her hand as Tooth caught her breath from her outburst.

"You are absolutely right Toothie darling." He said. "But…my arrows cannot fix this one. No, this is a delicate operation. It must be handled lightly. Drastic measures now could shatter our hopes, dear. Or explode into a passionate mess across the buffet table the likes of which no human pornography has ever portrayed. Hopefully the later. But, I am confident things will have progressed by the end of the week. Nobody can resist the pull of love." Tooth grabbed his face.

"So you'll help?!"

"Wait, I did not say-"

"Okay, we need to get them alone at dinner. Ooh! Should we make sure they have some roses on the table and oh we need candles! And chocolates! Sugar-free chocolates!" Cupid sighed as Tooth fluttered about, Jack and Bunny still tossing banter back and forth. He chuckled before taking another drink, smiling at the invisible to all but him red thread connecting their hearts and the two other spirit's hearts light with attraction to the fiery winter spirit.

"Been a while since I got to play match maker personally." He chuckled, setting down his drink and cracking his fingers. "THIS is going to be entertaining."


	3. Interaction

"It's been a while since I saw some fresh blood aboard." Chuckled Hallow, watching the adorable winter spirit with the guardians. "Who knew a winter spirit could be so…hot?" Fool glared at him.

"Come on man, that was WEAK." He snorted. "But I have to admit, he IS a pretty little thing for a guy." Hallow carefully observed the new spirit, studying his body language as he interacted with a few spirits, but mostly the Guardians. Of course, all the new spirits were awed by them. But, nothing betrayed it was more than a friendly relationship or introduction.

"And hot damn he's single." Hallow chugged his orange liqueur, and slammed the glass down. The music was to loud for anyone but Fool to hear. He saw the rabbit's ear twitch, but nothing more. "I'm going for it. C'mon Fool, I need my wing man here." Fool sighed, knowing full well how true that statement was if Hallow's abysmal attempts at flirting were any indication. Oh well. The spirit laughed at their prank. This may not actually be that bad.

_ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROT-ROTG_

"Jack, this is Cupid!" said Tooth, dragging the red head with angelic white wings over to the winter spirit. Cupid chuckled, sensing Jack was a bit overwhelmed by the multitudes of spirits on board. Smiling, he gently took Jack's hand and watched the red thread flare on Bunny's end. Gently he shook, seeing the glow of jealousy die a bit. It really WAS a lot of fun to make a Guardian squirm. But, he had ulterior motives. He had to give the rabbit a chance to confess on his own before pulling out the big guns. Though, in all honesty he had been dying to test out the new soul mate seeker he'd been working on…

"Nice to meet you, Jack Frost." He chuckled. He felt the advance of a rival heart, and couldn't help but feel a rush. He had forgotten how much fun love triangles could be.

"Haven't seen you before." Jack turned, as well as the other Guardians, to see Hallow and April Fool standing by. "What's your name Snowflake?" Bunny visibly bristled in annoyance, making everyone but Jack and the prankster duo jump. Cupid had to avert his eyes, the red flare almost too much. So…the Pooka didn't like anyone else nick-naming Jack.

_In the vault._ Cupid chuckled. Really, the Guardian of Hope was so hopelessly in love. He had to give him credit for willpower on his silence.

"Jack Frost." Said Jack, recognizing Hallow's Black hair with bright purple, green and orange streaks and Fool's rainbow spikes. "You set up that slip and slide prank, right?" Hallow grinned.

"Liked that, huh?" he chuckled. "Halloween Night and April Fool, pranksters extraordinaire. But you, Jack, may call me Hallow." Now, Jack wasn't stupid. He knew when he was being flirted with, but normally he chose not to respond. Responding to Pitch, after all, would have been a nightmare in itself. But, Jack couldn't stop the cold blush spread across his cheeks. He saw Bunny's fur stand up a bit, and in the corner of his mind he couldn't help but wonder why, but at the moment there was somebody besides his fellow Guardians (That was NOT a sworn enemy trying o take over the world) paying attention to him like he was the world at that moment.

And to an attention starved immortal teenager, it felt_ good_.

"Pranks you say?" he said coyly and smiling, making Tooth swoon a bit from her view of his teeth. "I got a good one on the Kangaroo yesterday."

"Oi, I'm a bunny ya bloody show pony!" Jack stuck his tongue out at Bunny, still mad at him for earlier that morning at the pool.

"Kangaroo?!" Fool cracked up, having to grab a chair for support, Hallow getting a good laugh out of it. Jack positively GLOWED with happiness, and sent a knife through all the Guardian's hearts. It was partially their fault he hadn't been exposed to a sense of companionship for three hundred years.

"Why don't we exchange notes?" suggested Hallow, grinning. "Say, over a few drinks?"

"Sure!" said Jack, excited to have met new friends, letting Hallow take his hand and pull him into the mess of dancing and drunk spirits. Cupid looked at Bunny and almost recoiled at the backlash of emotions rolling through him. He felt a stinging slap of hurt, a coil of jealousy and guilt take up in his stomach, as well as pure fear of driving the spirit away and losing his chance. A rush of loving protectiveness washed over him as Jack disappeared into the crowd, the rabbit perking his ears for any sound to betray Jack needed help.

"This MAY be harder than I thought…" he said quietly. But, at least he had a game plan. The Pooka seemed unable to control his attraction when he felt Jack or was in immediate danger of any kind, and had a protective streak a mile wide of the boy. But no, Hallow wouldn't do. The boy was too sweet on Jack. No, he needed someone harmless, but so high on the Pooka's animosity list that there was no way in HELL he could just stand by and watch. And, besides Pitch, there was only one spirit holding that honor. Silently he slipped away, arrows and bow appearing in his hands as he flew high above the crowd, eyes determined. Cupid was on a mission.

He was hunting groundhogs.

_ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROT-ROTG_

Jack laughed as he, Fool and Hallow exchanged war stories, or, more accurately, the pranks of epic proportions they had pulled over their painfully long immortal lives over some brightly colored drinks and nachos.

"You iced over Bunny's tunnels?!" laughed Fool. "And he DID'NT strangle you?!"

"Oh, he strangled me…" began Jack. "But he had to catch me first. He chased me over four continents and finally caught me at the Pole. It took North another two hours before Sandy showed up and knocked him out with the sand. And then there was the great tennis ball flood of yesterday morning…" Jack slipped a snapshot of him floating above a sea of rainbow tennis balls, the Pooka chasing after him looking ready for blood while he threw snowballs at the oversized rabbit. Hallow and Fool doubled over laughing, Jack tucking the photo back into his pocket.

"You, my friend, are a genius." Cackled Fool. "We really should get together sometime. Prank the living daylights out of the humans."

"Or spirits." Chuckled Hallow. _Just Dance_ began as the spirits readied for another dance, and Hallow glanced at Jack.

"Hey Jackie, lets dance." He said, pulling him lightly from the stool. Jack laughed, the light frosting on his cheeks returning as he was led on to the dance floor. Hallow spun him around the floor, making Jack laugh in exhilaration. The flashing lights painted him multiple hues of blue, pink, gold and purple, the loud base creating a moderate pace that was fast enough to stay fun but slow enough not to be a workout. He laughed as Tooth, dancing with a spirit he had been introduced to as Father Time, laughed and gave him a thumbs up, North and Sandy chuckling as Jack was spun around by the lively spirit of Halloween, Fool hitting on a few muses as they danced. Jack was dipped down low, brushing his hair against the floor. He caught sight of Bunny and immediately felt something was off. But what it was, he couldn't tell. Suddenly he heard a voice.

"Mind if I cut in?" Jack saw what, for lack of a better explanation, looked like a giant groundhog. He had to admit, he was curious. How many other giant talking animals were there besides Bunny?

"Who are you?" asked Jack curiously.

"Call me Hog." Said the groundhog. "As you can probably guess, I'm the Groundhog. You know, just deciding when Spring comes. No big deal." Jack laughed. Finding the remark funny. Hallow frowned but, seeing as he and Jack were not a couple, and had barely met, he felt he had no right to deny the winter spirit the contact. He let Jack take the Groundhog's paw, and jumped as the brown furred mammal spun off with the spirit as _If I Had You_ blared from the speakers.

"Cupid…why is the Groundhog making goo-goo eyes at Jack?" asked Tooth, fluttering over to the smirking spirit at the sight of Jack and the Groundhog twirling about the dance floor.

"All part of the plan darling." He chuckled. "Look at Bunny." Tooth jumped a bit, eyes wide. Bunny was watching the couple out of the corner of his eyes, obviously at war with himself. His affection for Jack and desire for his happiness battling with his severe hatred of the Groundhog. He was grinding his teeth in annoyance, and she could see his fur fluff out a bit in annoyance. His foot tapped so fast she could barely see it and he was stiff in the shoulders, other spirits taking notice of his aura and steering clear as he downed another drink.

"I do NOT want to be on his bad side right now." Said Tooth, shivering. "But WHY?!"

"Because the only way to hammer it home to Bunny he NEEDS Jack, is to make him jealous and fear losing him." Said Cupid. "And to get Jack to figure it out, he needs to know the stubborn old rabbit actually cares about him. So, BAM! Shoot the Groundhog in the ass with a short lasting arrow, let the tension build, and enjoy the glorious aftermath." Tooth nearly screamed.

"Cupid! Remember last time you shot a spirit?!" she squeaked. Cupid froze.

"SHIT! The Immortal Effect. Well, there goes a huge wrench into the plans." Suddenly he froze, smile painting his lips. "Wait…this could work to our advantage." Tooth stared incredulously at him.

"How?!"

"I assumed that the arrow would wear off in a few days, so I increased the passion to offset the time limit." He said. "Meaning-"

"You put him in the hands of a VERY strong animal basically on a super strong version of Viagra?!" shrieked Tooth. "Are you INSANE?! We want Jack and Bunny to hook up, NOT get my Sweet Tooth molested!"

"But, that also means this will speed up the process." Chuckled Cupid. "I'll get Mother Nature to extract it if it gets too bad and we'll step in if needed. One way or another, those two will be together by the end of this vacation if it's the last thing I do!"

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Jack almost flopped into the chair as the fifth song ended, tired from the heat of the dances and exposure to the crowd. The Groundhog was nice enough, and he looked forward to making friends with him, but it just didn't feel…right, his paws on his hip and hand as he spun him around the floor. No matter how often he tried to see rough brown fur and eyes, he could only feel lean muscle and soft gray fur, green eyes staring back at him. But, why was Bunny even on his mind? He was about to ponder it when he felt the bristled fur again.

"You really are something else Snowball." Said the Groundhog. He saw the Groundhog move, when Tooth fluttered in.

"Jack, come on!" she said, pulling him away. "It's almost midnight! It's about time we all got to bed." Jack yawned and nodded. He WAS tired.

"See ya tomorrow Hog." He said, letting Tooth drag him off. He got a weird feeling as he looked at Bunny, the Pooka refusing to met his eyes. Something big was going on, though what he couldn't quite place with the Pooka's behavior.

"You alright Kangaroo?" he asked, floating up to meet his gaze. Aster snorted and swatted him away like a annoying fly.

"I'm fine Frostbite." He scoffed. "Don't ya be going soft on us now. Just drank a bit too much." Jack cocked his head. Yeah, something was definitely up.

Now, if only he could figure out exactly what that something was.

_**Okay peoples! Double upload this week! MAYBE even a triple if I get inspired. Having inspiration issues for The Tumblr Trolls, but nothing an epic texting battle or conversation with my friends won' fix. Seriously. If you could bottle our conversations, they'd be better than any drug. MAD TV could probably get a few seasons out of us in a week. Next Chapter things get complicated! Stay tuned, my fabulous readers! Stay tuned!**_


	4. Distraction

Jack was curled up in his bed, sleeping soundly as the door quietly creaked open. Two figures snuck in, eyes trained on the sleeping spirit, bits of snow having fallen on the bed from Jack's own personal weather system. Both spirits grinned and nodded, raising their hands holding small canisters as the lowered themselves on each side of the bed.

"3…2…1…"

Jack screamed as the sound of air horns blared in his ears, thrashing about in a panic while the sound of Russian curses, a female squeak and a loud curse came from the other rooms. Hallow and Fool were doubled over in laughter, Jack having tangled himself in the covers and fallen in a heap on the floor, frosting over and freezing the covers in place. North, Sandy, Tooth and Bunny burst in, ready for a fight. When they found the two spirits rolling on the floor in hysterical laughter and a frozen blanket burrito rolling around on the ground, all stopped and stared. Tooth was the first to laugh, quickly followed by North and Sandy rolling around while his sand made unintelligible shapes in the air. Bunny seemed to be the only one not finding any par of this amusing. He cracked some of the ice and lifted the blanket, revealing Jack with a down right adorable little pout on his face.

"Ya'll right Frostbite?" asked the Pooka, helping him break the ice and squirm out of his prison.

"Hot DAMN you should have seen the look on your face!" laughed Fool, Hallow clutching his sides and wiping a tear from his eye. Hallow pulled out a camera, grinning.

"And oh he will." Snickered Hallow. Jack couldn't help but giggle. He had to admit, they got him good. Aster whacked the now empty blanket shell and broke the ice, leaving the waterproof material in it's former blanket state and tossing it on the bed. Then he rounded on the two pranksters.

"That wasn't funny." Huffed Aster.

"Of course it was!" cackled North. "Bunny must light up, ja? Even Jack laugh, and he ice burrito moments ago!" Aster rolled his eyes and huffed as Hallow and Fool put their arms around Jack, smiling innocently.

"Yeah, lighten up Roo." Snickered Hallow. Fool chuckled, Aster growling with his eyes narrowed. Jack, seeing him reach for his boomerangs, quickly intervened.

"What's going on?" whispered Cupid, startling Tooth as Jack pulled away from the pranksters.

"Relax Bun-Bun." Said Jack, smiling, lightly pushing on the Pooka' shoulders. "I have to admit, they got me. And I probably would have laughed if I did it. No harm done. Thanks for getting me out of that by the way, and running to my 'rescue'." Cupid grinned, seeing both sides of the red string glow. He could see the color of Hallow's heart change, a look of realization strong on his face, as well as a small twinge of pain. Heartbreak was never fun, but it would soon fade.

"Oi, we only dragged ourselves over cause ya were screaming bloody murder." Huffed Aster, ears flat against his head. "It sounded like Pitch was back and trying to drag ya down to his ruddy little pit of misery." Jack laughed, tugging on one ear with an impish grin. The guardians all rolled their eyes, knowing full well what was coming.

"Awe, my knight in furry armor." Said Jack in a sing-song voice, making even North do a double take as Aster sputtered. Cupid felt like slapping both of them. It was so freaking OBVIOUS! But, he was heartened by the glowing of the string. He crossed his fingers behind his back, praying to Manny that Jack would figure it out, when IT happened.

"Uh…am I interrupting anything?" All heads turned as a ghost stood in the door, holding a large bundle of pure white and blue roses. Tooth looked like she wanted to rip her feathers out, Fool actually giving her a sympathetic look.

"No." said North simply. The ghost strode in and presented the bouquet to Jack, who immediately flushed. Whether it was from the flowers or the fact he had just received a bouquet, in his pajamas in front of his Father figure from a secret admirer.

"From the gentleman you danced with last night." he said formally before taking his leave, Jack a little shell shocked.

"Wasn't me." Said Hallow as heads turned in his direction. Aster bristled a bit, Jack looking at the small card and blushing. Cupid barely restrained from pulling out his hair and screaming, regretting the dosage he shot into the Groundhog. Jack looked up from the flowers and glared at all of them.

"…not that I don't enjoy the company, but can I get dressed now?" Tooth chirped, remembering the itinerary for the day.

"Oh! We're getting shore time!" she exclaimed, zipping back to her room. She came back with a bag and yanked out a blue and white Hawaiian print shirt and a large sun hand paired with sunglasses. "C'mon! Gotta look the part! We're playing tourist!" Tooth somehow managed to shove everyone out while cornering Jack, the flowers being used as some kind of shield. The others stared a moment while a few crashes and yells came from the room before, with a yell and a covering of frost, Tooth was ejected and the door slammed.

"Fine, I'll wear it but OUT!" The small crowd merely stared at each other for a moment before returning to their own rooms, preparing for their trip to the island of Kauai.

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"Wow…" said Jack, holding the wide brimmed hat down as the tropical breeze blew at his face. Aster smiled, seeing Jack's blue eyes wide with awe as they docked and readied for their day ashore. And, come Hell or high water, he would make sure he enjoyed it. He was thankful nobody noticed (and if they had, they had the tact not to mention it) his rising temper from this morning. That greasy little dag Groundhog was trying to woo Jack, and no way in Hell was he letting THAT nightmare happen. He knew Pitch (And more than likely Tooth) would have a field day with this, and he could then kiss any chance of a good night's sleep goodbye. And the prank from this morning didn't help. He was on his guard and ready to fight off ANYBODY who tried anything with his Jack. Bunny shook his head.

_Shut up you possessive bastard._ He didn't notice Jack was looking at him until he felt a cool hand on his arm.

"Hey, you okay Bunny?" he was never more relieved by the fact he had fur, as if he didn't Jack would be seeing his blush, but cursed his luck as his ears went flat against his skull.

"I'm fine Frostbite." He said. "Just annoyed with the bloody arses."

"It's fine." Said Jack, smiling. "It was just a little prank. Nobody got hurt, it just gave everyone a shock. They promised not to do it again." Aster smiled a bit, mostly at Jack's smile and partially at the fact the winter spirit was holding his arm. Meanwhile, Tooth and Cupid were watching with wide grins, Cupid actually doing a small fist pump.

"Have to admit, those flowers this morning had me worried." Said Cupid. Tooth nodded in a agreement.

"I know." she said, smiling. "But, now we can go track down Mother Nature and have that little issue removed." She chirped happily, pulling out a camera. She snuck up on the two, camera ready to capture a perfect moment. She snapped a picture, Jack laughing and Bunny smiling softly as they reached the beach, Jack fluttering about but remaining anchored to Bunny. She and the others reached the beach, and were about to call out to them before someone beat them to it.

"Hello Jack." Aster's eyes narrowed at the Groundhog, said oversized animal having eyes only for Jack. "I didn't know you had a pet bunny."

"Hello to ya too, ya bloody dag." Snorted Aster. Jack flinched at the intense tension between the two as Hallow and Fool approached.

"What the Hell?" asked Hallow, looking on in confusion with the Guardians, Fool scratching his head.

"Damn it!" huffed Cupid. "And things were going so well!"

"What's going on? You sound pretty upset Cupid." All heads turned as a red head with flowers blooming in her hair walked over, a small trail of hibiscus flowers ground behind her.

"Mother Nature!" North swore in Russian, formally bowing towards one of the world's most powerful spirit, the only spirit who had refused guardianship (SUCCESSFULLY) in favor of caring for every being on Earth, human, animal or plant. Also, probably the wisest next to MiM himself. She took one look at the exchange between Jack, Bunny and Groundhog, quickly doing the math.

"Cupid…" she began. "You forgot about the Immortal Effect again, didn't you? Tell me, why exactly is this so important you broke your own mandate not to interfere in the love lives of fellow spirits, especially with those potent little drugs you have to affect their poor minds, and which one did you shoot?"

"Groundhog." Sighed Cupid. "It was a micro dose, but…"

"Ah, that explains it." she said, snickering. "Trying to get Bunnymund jealous enough to swallow his pride. Excellent plan. Lucky for you we are in Kauai, and this place has a reputation for romance. I say we ditch Frosty and Buns in a botanical garden for a few hours and see where it goes."

"That's…that's actually not bad…" said Cupid. Mother Nature clapped, going into general mode.

"Good!" she said. "Now, let us go! Theres shaved ice to be had, gardens to be seen and lovers to unite!" Mother Nature walked purposely forward towards the trio and pointedly shoved her way between Jack and the ground hog, shoving Jack closer to Bunny.

"Hello dear, I don't think we've formally met." Said Mother Nature, shaking Jack's hand. "Mother Nature. And you are the new Guardian, Jack Frost. It's a pleasure to meet you. Now, daylight is wasting and I for one want to see the beaches. Groundhog, care to accompany me? Seems they already have a full travel group, and I would just LOVE to hear a few of your stories. Have you managed to get rid of your mole problem yet?" Tooth watched slack-jawed as Mother Nature leg the Groundhog away, sending them a covert wink as Bunny and Jack stared in awkward silence after her.

"…Okay, is it just me, or is she completely off her rocker?" asked Jack.

"Awe, who cares?" said Fool. "Lets go! We have things to do, locals to prank, places to see!" Bunny couldn't help but send a smug look at Groundhog, who glanced back as he was dragged off. Mother Nature was s good spirit, polite and loving if not a bit insane. But, she was one to be taken in small doses. Normally he would sympathize with the victim, even the Hog if she captured them for the day, but he couldn't bring himself to muster the pity.

Serves the greasy little pillock right, flirting with his Jack.

_Damn it brain, shut the Hell up!_

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Jack was beginning to suspect something from Tooth. Well, not just Tooth. The entire group seemed to be going out of their way to have him and Bunny talk, and Hallow seemed a little distant on the subject. Not that they ditched, no, but on the bus they had the two sit together, threw them both in the water at the beach, had them sit together for lunch and occasionally seemed to make them bump into each other. It was all very confusing to the spirit. Now he was actually alone, sitting on a rock on the beach, looking at the afternoon sky as slowly the sun began to set. Suddenly he felt a nudge.

"Oi Snowflake, what's with the funk?" Jack looked up to see Bunny, holding blue and green shaved ice.

"I'm not in a funk." Said Jack. "Just relaxing." Aster looked at him a moment and handed him the blue shaved ice. Jack looked up in confusion.

"Yer favorite's raspberry." Shrugged the Pooka before crouching down next to the winter spirit. Now Jack was really confused. How did the Pooka know his favorite flavor? As if reading his mind, the Pooka smiled. "Well, it's kind of obvious with how fast North's raspberry snow cone syrup disappears since ya joined."

"Let me guess…" began Jack, laughing at the green ice for Bunny. "Either green apple or watermelon."

"Green apple." Said Aster. "How'd ya guess?"

"Because I know you like apples and you usually have watermelon when I break in." said Jack, flushing a bit. He took a bite of the ice and smiled as cool rushed through him and the flavor tickled his taste buds. The conversation eased into simple silence, the two watching as the sun began to set. Cupid, the Guardians, Hallow and Fool watched a little bit off, with their own shaved ice. Jack had long abandoned his hat, the thing making it hard to see, leaving his white hair to shimmer and sway in the breeze. If the humans could see them, they'd probably think they had gone insane. A little way off, Mother Nature was chatting the Groundhog's ear off. Said Groundhog shot a few glances at Jack and Bunny, obviously sick of Nature.

"So, you shot Groundhog to try and play match maker for Jack and Bunny." Said Hallow.

"I love messing with people, but the arrows are sacred." Said Cupid. "Only used them because hats the only magic I have that works on spirits. I considered you, but you would be too sweet on Jack, and you're not infuriating enough to make the old fur ball make a move. It's my job to make sure soul mates find each other." North choked o his pineapple shaved ice.

"Soul mates?" asked Tooth excitedly.

"The red thread never lies." Said Cupid. "And it's obvious to anyone with eyes. Bunny needs fun and happiness, and Jack needs hope and love. It's rare a true soul mate is ever found for another, but when it happens, it's my duty to make sure they find each other. I'll send Hog an explanation and a gift basket when this is over. Sometimes love needs a little help, and things seem to be going well now. Now, Tooth darling, I think Bunny has his motivation. It's time for phase two." Tooth giggled, pulling out the dinner passes to the fanciest restaurant on the ship.

"If this doesn't set the mood, nothing will." While they laughed and Jack and Bunny unconsciously leaned against each other, the Groundhog glared at the two Guardians on the beach, jealousy burning under his fur. He noticed how Aster absentmindedly touched Jack's hand and his mind was made up.

This was war.


	5. Complication

Jack lay in bed, thinking. In one hour he was due downstairs for dinner, and he only had to change before going. He held in his hand a shell, somehow blue in a sea of pink and white that Bunny had found and given to him yesterday evening in Kauai. His head swam with questions and his heart drummed, the scene of yesterday evening at the docking site, the sun setting in gorgeous hues of red, orange and pink, making way for the dark violet night strong in his mind…

_ "Hawaii is so beautiful." Said Jack, smiling. Bunny nodded, the two taking a stroll while the spirits regrouped. Multicolored blooms stared at them from the jungles, the pristine sand sparkling almost like snow in the dimming light._

_ "Gotta admit, gives the Warren a run for it's money." Agreed Aster. Admiring the flowers and mentally storing them away for future reference. Jack let the water lap at his toes, watching with interest as he lightly iced the water, though it broke soon after thanks to residual heat. He saw the water lap oddly to his left, and noticed Aster was wading in._

_ "Bunny?!" Jack gave him a look, knowing he hated getting wet. Aster crouched down and fished something from he water, a look of surprise on his face. The object in hand, he trudged back to shore, fur on his arm and almost to his tail soaked. Aster shook most of the water from his fur, splashing Jack a bit._

_ "What the Hell Bun-Bun?" huffed Jack. "What got you so excited you decided to go for a bath and give me a shower?!" Aster grinned, holding up a small, coiled blue seashell._

_ "Never seen a blue one before." He said."They're usually pink." Jack stared at the shell for a moment…and swiftly cracked up._

_ "Y-You go so excited o-over a-ha ha shell?!" laughed Jack, clutching his sides in mirth. He expected Aster to yell at him and tell him off, anything but what he did. Jack jumped as one paw grasped his hand. His voice died in his throat as he felt something press against his palm. It was the shell, and Jack had to admit it was beautiful. It had an abstract floral pattern and white specks fading into the hard shell, almost as delicate as his own frost but a bit more vibrant like a baby blue flower._

_ "The colors suit ya." Said Aster absentmindedly. "Ya hand on to it. Maybe start yerself a collection." Jack blushed a deep blue, examining the shell in his hand. It was sturdy, but appeared so delicate._

_ "Thank-you." Said Jack, looking up from the shell while his fingers ran over the smooth surface. Aster was looking at him with his ears down flat, and he could practically see the blush on his cheeks. They had no idea how long they looked at each other, nor did they notice they seemed to be gravitating together._

_ Until the fog horn blared from the boat, making them both jump. Jack blushed and Aster's ars went back._

_ "Um, we should probably get back to the-"_

_ "Y-yeah." The silence was awkward the whole way back, Jack's heart thumping madly. He couldn't help but Notice Cupid had developed a twitch, his left eye twitching slightly when he looked at him and Bunny. Still, he didn't truly care. Instead of joining the others on deck for drinks and elbow-rubbing, he retreated to his room and sat himself on the bed. He fished out the cell phone Sandy picked up from Jamie and dialed in the provided number after taking a picture of the shell and typed a picture message._

_**Hey little dude! Vacations going good! What kind of shell is this? The Kangaroo found it and gave it too me. Got you guys some souvenirs from Kauai!**_

___Jack sighed and flopped back on his bed, when a shrill chime and a buzz alerted him to the phone. Jamie had already replied._

_**No idea but it looks cool :) Sweet! What's Kauai like? And DUUUUDE! Why did Bunny give you a shell? Sorry, Pippa and Cupcake wanna know.**_

_ Jack smiled, and frowned as he remembered their parting with Pippa and Cupcake going on about sexual tension and them crushing on each other._

_**Totally awesome! Amazing beaches, huge botanical gardens, great restaurants, and EVERYONE can see us! This town was SUPER superstitious. He said something about a collection and the colors suiting me, and I was like all WHAAAAAAAAAT? But okay, cause this is actually pretty cool LOL XD**_

_ The phone buzzed after a ten minute break, in which Jack had used the wind to drill small holes in the shell, and was in the middle of attaching it to a string when the chime came again._

_** Hey Jack! It's Pippa and Cupcake! No offence, but it's obvious Bunny likes you! Now, we locked ourselves in the bathroom with the phone, and we won't stop bugging you until you answer, so lets make life easier on us and talk about this.**_

_ Jack blushed, but replied, resigned to his fate. He knew not to underestimate the girls, and didn't want this brought up later in front of Jamie, or where Bunny might hear._

_** Le sigh~ fine.**_

_ Jack jumped as almost immediately the phone chirped._

_** Okay, tell us EVERYTHING. How do you feel around Bunny? What happened today? How has he been acting?**_

___Jack paused a moment, thinking back over the last few days._

_** …I don't know. Today we hung out a lot and got some shaved ice, and took a walk waiting for the ship. And he HAS been acting off around me lately. He's freaking me out a bit but OMG I think I almost KISSED him! After the shell thing we were like…uncomfortably close.**_

_ Jack set the shell necklace down when the phone chirped._

_**REALLY?! OMG man why didn't you?! He's totally into you Jack! Grab the bull by the horns or, rather, the Bunny by the ears and take control! I mean, you two would be such a cute couple!**_

___Jack looked at the roses and frowned._

_** I don't know…but I think there's this other spirit that has a crush on me. I danced with him last night, I mean come on, trying to make a good impression and make a few friends, but he sent me roses this morning. I'm not sure; pursue the Kangaroo issue or the Groundhog?**_

___Jack was almost surprised by the message he received._

_ Almost._

_** Dude, ditch Mr. So-scared-of-his-shadow-he-decides-seasons-off-it and get with the Bunny! He's probably more fun anyway. Theres a reason why they say fucking like bunnies. Besides, for a rabbit, Bunny is HAWT.**_

_ Jack coughed, shocked._

_**Oh, the brain bleach I'll need for that. You two are WAY to young to be thinking about that!...even if you are right…GYAHH! Stupid Kangaroo WHY did he have to start making my chest feel funny?!**_

_ Jack huffed at the response._

_** It's love Jack. You can fight it all you want but your only hurting yourself. Give it a shot and see. It's easy to see Bunny cares about you. Tooth, North and Sandy see it too. You know Bunny wouldn't hurt you on purpose, but you don't know about this Groundhog. Give Buns a chance!**_

_ "Oi Frostbite, ya feeling alright?" Jack looked at the door, thinking it over. Quickly he replied to the girls._

_**I'll think about it. Got to go, say bye for me!**_

_ Jack hid the phone and the necklace, then made his way to the door. He opened it to see Bunny, looking a bit worried._

_ "I'm fine. Just tired. May not have overheated but the sun did a number on me." The Pooka nodded, looking a little relieved. "I'm just going to take a cool bath and go to bed. Thanks for worrying Bunny." He smiled as he shut the door, only to have the Pooka put his paw in the door._

_ "Er, Snowflake, just a mo." Said Bunny nervously. Jack opened the door again, wondering what the Pooka had to say._

_ "Yeah?" he asked. Aster scratched the back of his head, ears flat._

_ "Ya want to…ya want to get dinner tomorrow?" he asked. Jack flushed a bit, before nodding._

_ "S-sure." He said. "I'd l-love to."_

_ "Six thirty." Said Bunny, a little quietly but happily. "Top floor." Jack nodded._

_ "I'll s-see ya there Kangaroo."_

Jack looked at the clock, and jumped. Forty five minutes had already elapsed, and he was due for his dinner date with Bunny in fifteen minutes. Quickly he pulled on the outfit and fixed his hair. He slid on the shell necklace and checked the mirror. He had never been happier to have Tooth for a fashion consultant. He had on a dark blue shirt with snowflakes and light wisps of wind on the front and black skinny jeans. Tooth had insisted on a black jacket to make the attire more formal, and it fit him like a glove. Blushing, he checked his hair one more time and grabbed his staff. As he gave himself one final glance, it hit him.

"I'm going on a DATE with Bunny."

Something told him that he'd be conferencing with Pippa, Cupcake and Tooth later tonight.

_**YES IT'S A FILLER CHAPTER! Sorry, I hate them too, but this will be a double upload week. Besides, I like writing Jack as a confused teenager. I can relate to it on some level (I'm neither a boy or gay (Does Pansexual count as gay?)) But, yeah. Filler. UPDATE ON CIRQUE DU SOLEI TRIP! I'm getting there! 80$ to go, meaning 1 shift at work and BAM! First payment on March 5**__**th**__**! Also, feel free to PM me on any ideas for Tumblr Trolls (Any rating, as long as it pertains to my basic plot described in the little preview thingy). I'm seriously drawing a blank here! Even a little prompt would be nice. Seriously lacking the inspiration on that one…ANYWAY, Happy reading JackRabbit fans! The sex tape hidden chapter from the Ice Queen arc is under construction! Hoping to post it soon! Will be under First Night, as all my little PWP pertaining to the Ice Queen arc will be posted. Stay tuned or updates!**_


	6. Reservation

E. Aster Bunnymund, six foot one master of Tai-Chi, nerves of steel, the kick ass Australian Easter Bunny and Guardian of Hope, was nervous. He had gone ahead to ensure the table (despite the reservations he didn't remember making, but he had the passes, so he MUST have) and now was waiting. They had a breathtaking view of the ocean, the table right next to the clear wall gazing out over the pool deck and tropical waters, the dark silhouettes of the islands in the distance, only a few lights reminding him they were inhabited. Tooth had ambushed him after lunch, and thoroughly scrubbed and brushed his fur to silky perfection. If that wasn't unsettling (if not endearing) enough, North had dragged him aside as he was leaving (his ears picking up the sound of the shower from Jack's room), and given him the proverbial shovel talk, then slipped something into his armor pouches. He looked at the items now on his person and blushed with embarrassment, though the irony wasn't lost on him. Peppermint lube and red and green condoms. Only from North, he mused as he stuffed them back DEEP inside the pouches.

The white hibiscus in the vase on the table and tiny blue blossoms reminded him of the winter spirit, making him nervous as ever, his sensitive nose picking up the sweet scent of the flowers. His heart pounded as he heard the familiar crackle of ice.

"H-hi Bunny." Despite himself, Aster's mouth went dry. Jack's tight jeans looked painted on, his shirt print shimmering like snow. The black jacket made the whole thing look passably classy, and of course Jack wouldn't be caught dead without his staff.

"Looking good Frostbite." Jack blushed, obviously embarrassed. A few minutes passed in silence, the two becoming thoroughly engrossed in their menus.

"Good evening." Said a ghost waiter, coming to the table and pouring water in the less fancy glass. "What may I start you off with tonight? May I suggest Okanogan Valley Ice Wine?" Jack laughed.

"Oh wow! The Okanogan Valley." He snickered. "The weather there is almost ALWAYS perfect for a snow day! I always wondered why they kept harvesting grapes in winter…" Aster nodded and the waiter dully noted it. A platter of complimentary breads, fruit and cheese fondue was ordered as an appetizer, and the awkward silence resumed.

"…They aren't making progress. Cupid, they aren't making progress!" Said Tooth, peeking through the bushed lining the half wall separating the patio seating to the covered area, a few diners staring at the group of spirits in green camouflage (save for Cupid, in a fabulous pink ensemble with a red ascot) with war paint and binoculars with both amused and thoroughly confused expressions. A laptop with a camouflaged bandanna taped to the back was also perched on the wall, peeking at the unsuspecting couple.

"This is so exciting!" said Pippa, the Skype connection strong on the entire ship, and the two insisting on being part of the mission. "Hot DAMN Jack's looking good! Excellent work Tooth!"

"We have to get them talking." Said Cupcake. "That silence is WAY to awkward! Sandy…no, sorry but that's too obvious. They see gold sand and our cover is blown!" Tooth nodded in agreement as Cupid gasped. He pulled up his own flaming pink binoculars with heart shaped lenses and stared at the two, seeing the appetizer and wine come out.

"Ooh, ice wine!" he said. "Nice move Bunny! Showing some class! Everybody wants a sophisticated man!"

"Not everyone." Said Cupcake.

"Why do you think most men and women go gaga for suits?" asked Cupid. "The big ticket pieces are suits and pirate costumes. Too bad he's a bunny, because a tux would be sealing the deal right now. Note to self, design fur friendly formal wear. Bunny better be making me thank you chocolate for that!" Jack took a sip of the wine and his eyes widened.

"It's good…" he said, surprised.

"Only tastes this good because it was harvested at the perfect temperature." Said Aster. "The perfect temperature for yer snow days, if I remember correctly." Jack blushed at the cryptic compliment, Tooth and Cupid doing a small high five from behind their bush.

"So…" said Jack, tentatively looking at the grey furred Pooka. "Nice view, huh?" Sandy slapped a hand to his face, running his hand down dramatically as forced small talk left both their mouths.

"Um, can I help you?" asked a waiter, giving the group a look. Cupid took one last look at the couple as they moved onto the main course; salads for both, and sighed.

"Vodka stinger with a whiskey back." He groaned. "And anything creamy, fattening, deep-fried and covered in chocolate."

"What exactly do you want deep-fried?"

"I don't care, just make sure there is a LOT of it."

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Aster felt like banging his head against the railing of the ship. After the awkward, silent dinner, they had opted for a walk on the now quiet serenity deck, Manny shining brightly in the clear sky.

_Damn it Aster, say something smart!_ But, the Pooka's mouth remained frozen shut, his vocal chords refusing to cooperate.

Jack sighed, looking out at the water as the reached the front of the ship.

_Maybe the girls were wrong…He seems bored out of his mind!_ Suddenly Jack stopped, seeing something in the water, Aster walking on before he noticed Jack had stopped.

"Frostbite?" Jack was staring out at the water, a grin slowly spreading over his face. The Pooka sided over, staring into the surprisingly well-lit night to see sleek forms swimming through the water. Jack laughed as one jumped, and Aster realized the things were dolphins.

"They're even cooler in real life…" mused Jack, watching the wild dolphins swim and jump alongside the ship, squeaking and chirping as they went, frolicking in the waves without a care in the world.

"Ya never seen a dolphin before?" asked Aster, surprised. With how often the dream sand took the form of a dolphin over the boy's head, one would think he stalked the damn things like a creepy old man stalking the farmer's daughter. Jack shook his head.

"Nope." He said. "Always wanted to, though. I wish I could get closer, but I'd just freeze them…" Aster thought a moment, then an idea hit him. He grabbed Jack's hand and led him down the stairs.

"Bunny?! Where are we going?!" asked Jack, having to float to keep up.

"Ya said wanted to see em up close." Said Aster, opening a door with a plaque on the wood reading 'viewing deck'

"But why are we…wow…" Jack jumped a bit as the ocean spray hit him, the low deck barely above the water. Aster smiled, seeing Jack touch the railing with both hands as the ship jarred them. Tentatively, he put an arm around Jack and gripped the railing with both paws, like a safety belt for the nervous winter spirit. Jack shivered a moment before relaxing, and before either could speak a dolphin jumped out of the water right in front of them, making Jack shout in shock, awe and delight.

"Did you see that?!" laughed Jack, eyes gleaming with joy and excitement. Bunny laughed good-naturedly at the childish exclamation, watching the dolphins play much like the children they protect, seeing Jack's eyes light up as he laughed with glee. He barely noticed the slight chill from the breeze ruffling his sea spray soaked fur, or the fact that Jack's clothes were quickly getting drenched and freezing from his own body's natural cold. Finally the Dolphins tired of their game, giving a last few jumps before disappearing through the waves. For a long moment, there was no sound but the rushing water, the two frozen in place while the breeze swept over them affectionately. Bunny started a bit as he felt Jack move against him, head resting on his chest as he watched the dark retreating forms of the dolphins, thin, cool arms wrapped around his thicker furry one.

Jack hadn't noticed he was hugging Aster's arm until said appendage was wrapped over his hips and stomach, holding him gently. For the first time that night the silence was easy, the two completely content.

"Bunny…" began Jack, turning his head to look up at the Pooka. "You look like a drowned rat." Aster snorted indignantly, Jack laughing happily.

"Well, ya look like a salty frost-cicle Frostbite." Snorted Aster, making Jack laugh even harder. The sound was pure as freshly fallen snow, clear as crustal in the cool night air. Jack's smile was wide, flashing the pearly teeth that Tooth more than likely had fantasies that would make even Cupid blush with shame about, and despite the spirit's season and temperature, only served to make Aster warm with happiness.

Jack was only faintly aware his hands were on Aster's chest, having turned fully to give his lungs enough air to laugh, the Pooka's arm wrapped securely around his waist. He was too preoccupied with staring at the rare smile gracing Aster's features to notice their intimate position, how closely they were pressed together, or how he was looking right back at him.

"Hey, we're about to start a limbo contest!" Both spirits jumped as Clovis, the Leprechaun, kicked open the door, shirtless, and smelling strongly of beer. "Ooh, bad timing?" Jack pushed himself away from Aster, flushed blue.

"Uh…thanks for the night, Bunny." He said before bolting, Aster taking a step after him. Aster glared venomously at the Leprechaun.

"This couldn't have waited two blasted minutes?!" Clovis shook his head cheekily.

"Oi, I'm getting paid some good quality draft here!" he said. "Besides, alls fair in love and war fur ball, and me buddy Groundhog thinks it's DEFINITELY war." Aster saw red as the name registered.

"Okay ya bloody root rat." Growled Aster, making his way back up on deck where the Groundhog was already flirting with Jack under the close supervision of Fool and Hallow. "Ya want a battle? Yer getting one."


	7. Attraction

Bunny was on a mission. He knew of the Groundhog's gym addiction, and knew that if he wasn't stalking Jack, he would be in the ship's exercise room this far from happy hour. His paws were closed in angry fists, his mind on one track. He was secretly glad Jack had decided to sleep in, and the others let him, leaving him free to confront the greasy fur ball about his intentions. It took him only a few seconds to find the pillock, and only felt the anger in the pit of his stomach boil as he sent him a shit-eating grin.

"Why, good morning Bunny." He said. "Enjoy your night?"

"What the bloody Hell is yer problem?" hissed Bunny. "I know yer a right annoying old bugger, but isn't messing with the love lives of others Cupid's job?!"

"Let me level with you, Pooka." Growled Hog, eyes narrowing. "Jackie is fair game. I don't smell your scent on him. If I'm going to try for him…well, you know the saying. All's fair in love and war."

"Ya only met Snowflake a few days ago." Said Bunny. "No way in Hell are ya getting anywhere with him in a few days. Jack's not a fucking call girl for ya to play with and dump in the gutter when yer done."

"I never said he was." Said Hog. "But, get this, Bunny Foo-Foo. Frost is gonna be MINE, whether you like it or not, by the end of this trip. He just doesn't know it yet."

"If ya think I'm just gonna-" Aster's eyes widened as he saw the silver in the Groundhog's brown eyes, the memory of the last time he had seen such a thing. "Hog, stop this. Yer not actually in Love with Jack."

"Oh really?" snorted the furry brown mammal.

"Yer eyes got that silver glow." He said levelly. No, the Groundhog wouldn't avoid a good beating, but now that gift had been extended to Cupid. "Cupid's messing with ya."

"Cupid's got nothing to do with this." growled Hog. "I love Jack, and Jack will be mine, no matter what it takes." Aster bristled at the hidden meaning in the Groundhog's words.

"Over my dead body!" Aster felt a rush of satisfaction as his fist connected with the other animal's jaw, retracting into a fighting stance while the Groundhog rose, growling.

"You've started a fight you can't finish." With a feral growl the Groundhog struck a grazing blow, the Pooka to fast for him to connect fully with his face. Aster rushed forward, knocking down the Groundhog as they rolled about, biting, punching and growling in a feral mess.

"If ya DARE put yer grubby little hands on Snowflake I will personally rip off yer paws with a rusty hack saw!" threatened Bunny, the Groundhog dealing some hefty blows to his ribs. He responded with a powerful kick to the Groundhog's stomach, knocking the wind out of him. Hog hissed and clawed at Aster's ears. Aster growled at the pain in his most sensitive appendages and grabbed Hog's throat with one paw and smashed his fist into his gut and kidneys with force akin to a raging rhino and the speed of a jackhammer. The Groundhog grunted as Aster threw him off, smashing him against the wall, a boomerang pressed against his throat, sharp edge almost cutting his skin with the warrior rabbit glaring venomously at him.

"You can't win." Smirked Hog. "Jackie is fun, and you're a boring workaholic. He'll never be anything but bored by you. I knowhow to have fun. You don't stand a chance." Aster pressed the boomerang down a bit.

"Ya will NOT touch Jack." He growled. "If I so much as find out ya brushed somewhere intimate, I'll be slicing you open faster than you can say 'oops'." He dropped the Groundhog, and stepped back.

"You know I'm right Bunny Foo-Foo." Chuckled Hog, spitting blood from his mouth with a grin plastered on his ugly mug. "Jack's as good as mine." Aster flipped him off, stalking away to find the cherub of love.

It was time to introduce the annoyance to miss right hook.

_ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROT-ROTG_

Tooth, Cupid, North and Sandy were already hitting the sauce, depressed and frustrated while Cupid stuffed himself full of deep-fried, chocolate covered Twinkies. Mother Nature lay next to them, silent as she went over the events of last night.

"CUPID!" All jumped at Aster's loud, obviously pissed tone, the Pooka standing in front of the cherub with a dark, stormy expression, fur ruffled and claw marks on his ears and parting his fur in a few places.

"Ah, Bunny!" said North. "What is with the mood?" Aster growled.

"Cupid, ya shot the fucking Groundhog, didn't ya?" he growled. Cupid gulped, cowering a bit in his seat.

"Well, it depends on how you-" he stuttered before seeing the Pooka's green gaze intensify. Cupid sighed. "Yes."

"What the Hell?!" shouted Aster. "Ya got roos in the top paddock ya gumby! The bloody pillock is completely delusional, and he's planning on mating Frostbite before the week is up!"

"Oh shit." Said Cupid, eyes widening. "Damn it! I KNEW that extra drop of passion was a bad idea! Mother Nature-"

"Sorry, but I can't." said the spirit. "I need my supplies to perform that spell. I can't drain it out of him. Sorry, but he's stuck with it for at least another week or until I can drag him to Rose Haven for a spell." She snickered at her joke while the others groaned.

"What the bloody Hell were ya thinking diaper boy?!" roared Aster. "Ya put Jack in danger, caused one HELL of a mess, the bloody pillock actually deluded enough to think Jack is WILLING to go through with this, and now we can't even snap him out of it! How the Hell do we say to Jack he needs a constant body guard for the rest of the week and NOT tell him you were meddling like a nosy grandmother?! Yer gonna shatter ANY trust he has in us!"

"In my defence, it was part of the plan to get you to man up and present your suit, which by the way worked FABULOUSLY." Said Cupid. "But your right. This could be a problem. I'm the spirit of love, and damn it I will NOT have such a vile act in my presence as forcing affection on someone who does not want it!" He took a sip of his pina colada and cracked his knuckles.

"Ladies, gentlemen, I have a plan." Cupid shoved Bunny into a sitting position, the cherub going into general mode. He picked up fruit skewer and pointed it at Tooth.

"You, darling, will run distraction." Said Cupid. "Tonight we are having a barbeque on North shore. Keep the Hog occupied."

"Aye, Aye Captain." Said Tooth, saluting. Cupid pointed the skewer at Sandy.

"Sandy, you run damage control." Said Cupid. "If things get out of hand, use your dream sand." Sandy nodded, giving a thumbs up.

"What shall I do?" asked Mother Nature.

"You and North will be Tooth's backup." Said Cupid. "Keep the peace, and don't give these two the opportunity to fight." He pointedly looked at the scuffed up Pooka.

"Will be fun, ja?" asked North, sharing the look.

"And YOU." He almost stabbed Aster in the nose with the skewer. "You will pull out all the stops. Show off those surfing skills, go pick flowers, I don't care just put your energy into wooing Jack. Make him happy, and get it through his thick skull that he is in LOVE with you. Jack's not stupid, one good kiss ought to do it. And MiM help you if you fuck this up fur ball. It may be my job to unite lovers, but you two are QUICKLY trying my patients. Either forget it completely or go shag in a storage closet!" He calmly sipped his drink again, all the spirits staring a bit at his outburst.

"And if we four fail?" asked Tooth. Cupid grinned.

"THAT is where Hallow and Fool come in." snickered Cupid. "They prank the living daylights out of him, Hog is now distracted, and I am free to work my magic and make the PERFECT conditions for sweet, sweet l'amore." Aster wasn't sure if he should be disturbed at the brow wriggle Cupid had going on or not, so he merely kept a stoic expression. Suddenly they heard laughter from below, Jack, Hallow and Fool raising hell on the fiesta deck, throwing water balloons and spirits, causing a fun filled water war below. Aster couldn't help but smile as he watched the ruckus, when suddenly Jack caught sight of him and picked up a green water balloon.

"Come one Kangaroo!" he yelled, the water balloon hitting his chest. "Live a little!" Jack squeaked as Aster rocketed after him, picking up a blue water balloon and firing with, had it been a boomerang or egg bomb, deadly accuracy. Jack squealed in joy, soaked, and picked up more water balloons, chasing the rabbit wile they exchanged friendly fire and banter. Cupid grinned, Hallow and Fool giving him a salute before diving back into the fray as water guns were brought out.

"This may be my best plan to date." He chuckled before turning back to Mother Nature and the Guardians. "Okay everyone, we have work to do."


	8. Fruitation

"Okay Aster, you can DO this." said Aster to himself, giving himself a pep talk as he laid out his battle plan. It was too dark for surfing, the waters unsafe to navigate in darkness, but no, he had better plans up his sleeve, if he had sleeves, of course. Currently North was clapping Jack on the back while he observed the big man barbeque, a few of the other spirits chatting with him like old friends. Most, if not all the spirits, had quickly gotten over many of their misconceptions about the boy, and were already warming up to his snarky jokes and harmless, if not excessive, pranking.

That, and as the Guardian of Fun, he was pretty much the life of the party. A small part of Aster's brain laughed at the irony, considering Jack technically wasn't LIVING, like a select few, mostly younger in physical age, spirits chosen by Manny. The upside, the Hog couldn't get close. Down side, it was proving to be an uphill battle to get close himself. Finally, he managed to navigate through the crowd and reach Jack's side, trying to look nonchalant.

"Oi Frostbite." Jack turned and smiled at him, staff in one hand. Aster figured it was a security blanket for him in the crowd, unused to so many people TALKING to him. "Yer gonna melt if ya get any closer to North and the barbie."

"I'm not made of ice." Snorted Jack, giving him a mildly insulted but playful look. "Besides, SOMEONE has to make sure he actually makes something vegetarian." Aster blinked.

"We're prepared for North's meat obsession." said Aster. "Tooth brought enough veg to stuff a walrus."

"Cold is good, but Jamie told me about these things called veggie dogs." Jack picked up a package of hot dogs, clearly marked with a big label stating it was meat free. "They taste pretty good. His mom had to switch because he keeps insisting we have lunch instead of me waiting for him to finish. Guess he felt funny about me cleaning out the fruit stocks." Aster stopped, something in his mind clicking.

"Yer a vegetarian." He said flatly. Jack nodded.

"Well, yeah." He said. "Natural food is the way to go! Besides, I can't exactly cook meat when I can't make a fire, and the animals SEE me. It just wouldn't be right."

"Jack, you use oven at pole!" said North, ruffling Jack's hair like he was the boy's Father. "No more, pardon the expression Bunny, rabbit food. You need meat on bones! Much too skinny!"

"Shut yer gob North." Snorted Aster. "Jackie's fine. Nice to have another spirit around who appreciates the Earth's bounty." Jack laughed at the fake pained look North pulled before the Cossack joined in the laughter, even Bunny chuckling.

"Ah! You must try Bunny!" said North, holding up a skewer of the fake meat, freshly cooked and hot. "I admit, they are not bad!" He handed a skewer to Jack, who bit into it happily. Jack forced one into Bunny's paw, giving him an encouraging look as he took a bite out of a mushroom on his skewer. Aster tentatively nibbled at the odd vegetable-meat, making himself carefully examine the flavor for any form of meat. Aster blinked, ear twitching as he looked at Jack's expectant face, the winter spirit still munching away on his mushroom.

"Not bad." He said. "A little odd, but not bad." Jack grinned, making his heart pound.

"Knew you'd like it." he said coyly. He bit off a chunk of the placebo meat, chewing thoughtfully. Bunny couldn't help but watch Jack's pale lips move, and was sure he would be blushing under his fur. Bunny mentally slapped himself, cursing his mind for slipping towards the gutter. Out of nowhere a volley ball hit Jack in the back, shoving him into Bunny. Aster wrapped his arms around him, catching the startled spirit.

"Sorry Jackie!" shouted Fool, waving. Hallow winked at Cupid, the cherub nodding while Tooth went through proper bushing procedure to the Groundhog. "Hey! Come play with us! Me and Hallow against you and Bunny!" Jack suddenly realized Bunny was holding him and turned slightly blue, looking up at the Pooka. The last time they had been together like that…

"I'm in." said Aster. "Jack?" Jack nodded, squirming out of Aster's grasp.

"Y-yeah!" he said. Bunny grabbed Jack's hand, making the spirit blush, and pulled him towards the volley ball court, Hallow and Fool grinning at the blush on Jack's face.

"Things seem to be going swimmingly." Chuckled Cupid, sipping his orange dreamsicle while watching the two budding love birds.

Or undead immortals. Whichever sounded better.

_ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROTG-ROT-ROTG_

Jack shouted in victory as he scored a point, completely blindsiding Fool with a harsh spike, Aster getting the ball into the perfect position. So far both teams were tied, a small crowd having gathered to watch the showdown. Bunny took great pride in the fact the Groundhog was grinding his teeth, and swiftly receiving swats and threats from Tooth about it, and couldn't help a bit of a smug grin when he looked his way.

"Okay boys, this point wins it!" declared Cupid, filing his nails. "We're due on the ship soon for a bit of bingo!"

"Don't ya worry diaper boy." Snored Aster, grinning. "This'll end quick."

"Yeah!" said Hallow. "With you two ground to the dust!" With that Jack served, the ball bouncing back and forth furiously, neither side giving an inch, both sides exchanging friendly banter. Jack grinned, running up as the ball came forward. With a squeak the sand shifted under his foot, his flailing arm sending the ball askew as he caught his balance. With a harsh smack, Bunny spiked the ball, the ball rocketing into the sand on the other side so fast Hallow could barely see it. Tooth and North clapped, as well as most of the spirits, Jack laughing as Hallow and Fool admitted defeat in good humor. Bunny jumped a bit as Jack hugged him, the grinding from the Groundhog ceasing. Jack looked up, face nestled into his fur and chin on his chest.

"Nice shot Cottontail." He laughed, smiling brightly. He put one paw around Jack's waist, the rest of the spirits already on their way back. "Guess you're not such a stick in the mud after all." Aster laughed a bit at the joking insult. Their position was similar to that of their date before the Leprechaun interrupted.

Only this time, Tooth, Sandy, North, Mother Nature, Hallow, Fool and Cupid were blocking any interference.

"Snowflake, it seems I forgot to do something on our little date last night." Jack looked at him, a little confused.

"What?" he asked, cocking his head adorably to the side. Aster chuckled, gently tucking a tuft of snow white hair behind Jack's ear, Jack unconsciously pressing into his paw.

"This." Aster gently pressed his lips too Jack's, and he felt Jack stiffen and quickly relax, arms wrapping delicately around his neck as Jack responded to the kiss, his thin body pressed against him, Aster holding him with one arm around his waist, the other on his back. The feeling was electric, and the break for air came all too soon for either of them. Jack blinked lazily at Aster, and for a moment the Pooka was a bit nervous of rejection. His fear only worsened as Jack frowned, though it WAS a cute expression.

"Who said you could stop?" he said coyly before initiating another kiss, pulling Aster down to meet him.

Meanwhile, Tooth and Cupid were giving each other a high five, watching the romantic scene unfold.

"Mission accomplished." Said Cupid, seeing Jack's end of the red thread connecting their hearts glow strongly with Asters. He turned to his diligent army. "Now, who's up for celebratory jello shooters?" A laugh came from everyone but Sandy, who merely smiled at Jack and Aster, who had finally noticed they had to move their love-struck asses to the boat. Above him an image of a tie on a doorknob, a bunny and a snowflake floated, Sandy grinning impishly and wriggling his eyebrows. Cupid laughed, pounding fists with Sandy.

"That's it Sass-man." Snickered Cupid. "Bring out the earplugs tonight, ladies. Something tells me Jack is a screamer."

_**OMFG this chapter was a PAIN IN THE ASS to write! I literally re-wrote it SIX TIMES! But…le sigh~ the FEELS! Next chapter is NSFW! Seriously, kiddies be warned! Those with weak constitutions may want to exit the fanfic. Update on Calgary! I AM PAID OFF! I'm going to see Cirque de Sole, my childhood dream, not two weeks after my birthday. I. Am. Flipping. Happy. Shit. Seriously. You are NOT getting me down! Enjoy the new book cover, and please leave lovely reviews! Please, the Luvs and Feels are GREATLY appreciated! Tumblr Trolls is also coming along. Next chapter involves walruses. Nuff said. Until next time!**_


	9. Consumation

Somehow the bingo game aboard _The Flying Dutchman_ had morphed from a painfully calm, quiet game of bingo, to a full out fist fight, to a happy hour, and finally everyone admitted defeat and retreated to the karaoke bar. Which, of course, led to the disaster currently ripping apart a certain Pooka's eardrums, as North most DEFINATELY could not sing, nor could the completely shit faced Mother Nature, but OH the blackmail from this would be SO worth it. He heard Jack giggle as he covertly snapped a few embarrassing photos to lord over North when he was no longer inebriated, the winter spirit seated next to him with a cold hard lemonade. Both he and Jack had a pleasant buzz going, and seemed to be some of the few with enough restraint to pace themselves. The singing had turned into drunken ballads, a few of the spirits actually getting a bit frisky in dark corners, Clovis and the groundhog locked in a beer chugging contest after a drunken argument. Aster smiled sadistically as the Groundhog stopped and threw up, catching it on camera and promising to bring it up the next time they had the misfortune of meeting.

Wow, first he managed to snare Jack and plenty of his sweet, frosty kisses, next blackmail against North for the next few decades (or until the next major party when something better came up), and now something against the Groundhog? Life was sweet.

"Oi Jackie, yer awfully-" Aster stared blankly at the now vacant spot next to him, wondering where the Hell his snowflake could have wandered off to without him noticing.

"_Hi!"_

"_Hi!"_

"_We're your Weather girls, and have we got news for you!"_

Aster looked up on stage to see Jack grinning, Fool and Hallow up there with him with a microphone apiece as a familiar song began to play. Aster quickly set the camera to video mode and aimed, grinning as his snowflake winked at him.

_"You better listen."_

_"Get ready, all you lonely girls, and leave those umbrellas at home!"_ Jack did a cute little pose as he sang out his lines, his smile laughing and his eyes sparkling with happiness.

_"Humidity is rising..."_

"_Mmm...Rising..."_

"_Barometers getting low..."_

"_How Low girl?"_

"_According to all sources..."_

"_What sources now?"_

"_The streets the place too go..."_

"_We'd better hurry up!"_

_"Cause tonight for the first time, just about half past ten! For the first time in History, it's gonna start raining men!"_ Aster couldn't help but snicker as the three did a few hip pops, hamming it up and putting sass the likes of which he'd only seen Sandy display into their performance.

_ "It's raining men, hallelujah, it's raining men, amen!"_

_ "I'm gonna go out, I'm gonna let myself get-"_

"_Absolutely soaking wet!"_

"_It's Raining Men! Hallelujah, it's raining Men! Every specimen!"_

"_Tall, blond, dark and lean! Rough and tough and strong as meeeeeeee!"_

"_God Bless Mother Nature!"_

"_She's a single Woman too!"_

"_She took off to heaven!"_

"_And she did what she had to do~."_

"_She bought Every angel! And rearranged the skies! So that each and every woman, could find her perfect guyyyyyyyyyy!"_

"_Ooh it's raining men yeah!"_

"_Humidity is rising..."_

"_Humidity is rising..."_

"_Barometer's getting low..."_

"_It's getting low, low, low, low..."_

"_According to all sources..."_

"_According to all sources..."_

"_The street's the place to go..."_

"_For tonight for the first time, just about half past ten, for the first time in history, it's gonna start raining men!"_

"_It's raining men! Hallelujah, it's raining men! Amen! It's raining men! Hallelujah it's raining men, amen! It's raining men! Hallelujah it's raining men! Amen!"_

"_Tall, dark, blond and lean!"_

"_Rough and tough and strong as me!"_

"_She bought every angel!"_

"_She rearranged the sky!"_

"_Hallelujah!"_ Aster found himself laughing and clapping along with the drunk masses as the trio took an exaggerated bow, making way for the next pair of drunken idiots on stage.

"Ya would, Snowflake." Chuckled Aster as Jack slipped back to the table, Jack grinning happily and depositing himself on Aster's lap. Jack kissed Aster on the nose, smiling as the Pooka's ears flattened in embarrassment. Only then did Aster notice Jack's skin tone taking on a slight hue of pink, or the sweat dripping down his face.

"Your soft." He sighed, cuddling up to Aster. Aster grabbed the cold lemonade and held it against Jack's forehead, looking him over with a hint of worry.

"And yer overheating." He said flatly. "Come on Snowflake. Lets get ya in a nice cold bath." Jack nodded weakly and Aster scooped him up with one arm, thankful that everybody was too busy drinking, gambling and singing horribly to notice the two leave, save for a certain fairy and cherub, currently piss drunk but still retaining enough sense to toast their tequila in victory.

Aster carried Jack to his bedroom, a small part of his mind noting the wintery decor as he shut and locked the door, making a beeline for the washroom. One paw turned on the cold water, Jack curled up against his chest, using his shoulder as a pillow while his body tried to cool. Once the water was running, he added a bit of warm to the mix, not wanting to shock Jack. While the tub slowly filled, Aster began peeling off Jack's clothes, trying not to stare as silky white skin was revealed with each shred of clothing lost. Jack whined as he was peeled away from Aster, but sighed happily as he was settled into the cool water. Aster smiled as blue eyes sent him a grateful look, but was shocked to say the least, when Jack opened his mouth and tugged on his arm.

"Get in." He said, pulling Aster's arm into the water.

"Wha-" Jack gave him an adorable pout.

"Please?" he asked cutely. Aster fought with himself for a few moments, but sighed and relented.

"Alright." He said. Jack scooted forward, and Aster got into the chilly water behind him. The water wasn't actually that bad. Jack seated himself in Aster's lap, smiling as he reassumed his earlier position of using Aster as a chair and his shoulder as a pillow. Aster rubbed his side, enjoying the feeling of Jack curled up against him. Jack sighed and nuzzled against his neck and shoulder affectionately. Aster purred, the feeling surprisingly pleasant.

"Your fur is soft..." sighed Jack, running his fingers through the soft fur on his shoulders. Aster felt Jack shift, and suddenly he was looking into blue eyes. Without warning, Jack seized his ears, gently rubbing the bases. Aster purred, the touch extremely pleasant.

"A-Aster..." Aster blinked, realizing he had been nuzzling Jack's chest with his muzzle. His ears went flat as he apologized, pulling back. Jack huffed and pulled him back, letting Aster hear the unnaturally slow thumps of his heart.

"No, I like it." He sighed, holding the Pooka's face in place (Ha, rhyme). Aster tentatively continued, Jack's skin turning a bit blue. Suddenly Jack squeaked, pulling away, face bright blue. Judging by how tightly Jack was clamping his legs shut, Aster had an idea what was going on. He decided to push his luck, drawing the winter spirit in closer.

"It's okay Snowflake." Said Aster, running a paw down his side and to his lower back, pressing him firmly against Aster's body. Jack sighed as Aster kissed him, wrapping his arms around the Pooka's neck. Jack ran his nails down Asters back, hugging him tightly while paws wandered, never venturing farther than Jack consented. Suddenly, Jack pulled away.

"Bunny...maybe we could...a little more comfortable..." Aster nodded, wrapping an arm around Jack while he stood and stepped out of the tub, pulling the drain with his free paw while the two continued to kiss and tug at each other. Aster shook the bulk of the water from his fur, Jack wrapping his legs around Aster's hips for balance.

Jack gasped for air as he hit the mattress, feeling his fuzz ball lover's growing arousal rub against his own. He thought he heard a small beep as he pushed his elbow into a bed spring, but ignored it.

Meanwhile, the children of Burgess (Minus Sophie, who was at her own slumber party across town) were having a slumber party, munching on popcorn while watching an array of movies from the rental store. Suddenly Jamie's cell phone went off, a picture of a snowflake on the screen.

"I wonder what Jack's calling about..." said Jamie, turning on the speaker option on the phone. The sound of rustling sheet filled the air as well as heavy breathing, all faces going deep red as they realized Jack wasn't calling them. Cupcake and Pippa were bright red, mouths hanging open as they processed just what was happening.

Jack took in a breath as they broke from the kiss. He frowned as Aster pulled away.

"Ah, Snowflake-" Jack frowned and pulled on his fur, bringing him back down so their foreheads touched.

"If you even THINK about leaving me blue balled now, I swear to MiM I will castrate you faster than you can say rabbit stew." In Burguess, all mouths were hanging open as Jamie grabbed the phone and shut it off, the guys looking like they wanted to rip out their eardrums. Pippa and Cupcake turned to each other in the stunned silence before taking a deep breath and squealing.

"Was that-" stammered Claude.

"Yeah!" squealed Pippa, covering her mouth.

"And they were-" whispered Monty.

"Sweet Man in the Moon yes!" giggled Cupcake, the two girls bouncing and hugging each other. Jamie shivered.

"GOD the brain bleach I'm gonna need for THAT." He coughed. "I can't believe JACK would be receiving th-"

"GYAH! NO images!" screamed Monty, Claude and Clyde. "MY EYES!"

Back on the ship, Aster was reaching for the condoms and lube North had planted on him, hoping Jack took no offence.

"Mnmm, I don't-" Aster held up the Christmassy lube and condoms, grinning.

"Fer once North being a nosey bludger came in handy." He said, licking Jack's throat. Jack gulped as Aster popped the lube cap, shivering lightly as he squeezed a generous helping on his ass. Aster studied Jack's face as he slowly pumped his fingers in and out of the winter spirit. No way in HELL Jack had any experience, being as tight as he was. Jack gasped, tearing up at the foreign experience. He looked down and his eyes widened.

"Holy shit your big." He stated, chuckling nervously. Aster kissed him, adding another finger.

"Don't ya worry Snowflake." He said smoothly. "I'm gonna get ya nice and ready for me." Aster carefully rolled on a condom, only to have it break as soon as it touched Jack's cold body. Jack saw and gasped, Aster adding a third finger. It felt good, having his ass stuffed by the Pooka, and while it was doubtful to him that the monster Aster sported would fit, it would feel as good as Hell.

"Forget the condom." Panted Jack. "Just-Fuck! Put it in!" Aster nodded, slopping a healthy dose of lube on his cock and pulling out his fingers. Jack's breath hitched as Aster pressed against him, rubbing against his hole. Jack hissed as Aster pushed in, slowly as to cause as little pain as possible, Jack's hips shaking and nails digging into his back.

"Oh MiM!" squeaked Jack. "You're ripping me in half!" Aster licked away the cold salty tears, still slipping in.

"Almost there Snowflake." He panted. "Yer doing fine." Jack cried out as Aster's hips met his, gasping for breath. Aster slowly withdrew an inch and went back, giving Jack time to adjust. Once he began to push back, Aster knew he was ready. Jack grabbed his shoulders as he began to pound into the spirit, Jack crying out as he hit his prostate.

"MnOHGOD! Bu-fu-BUNNY!" Aster captured Jack in a kiss, pressing their torsos together with one arm wound around his lower back. "THERE! MiM harder!" Aster obeyed until all that came from Jack's mouth were incoherent slurs and screams. He felt Jack begin to tighten and pulled the boy up, impaling him on his lap and letting the boy ride him.

"That's right Jackie." Huffed Aster, pushing up while he slammed Jack's hips down. "FUCK, yer tight!" Jack screamed, a bit of slushy droll coming from his mouth. He grabbed aster and kissed him, tongues dancing as he felt the coil in his stomach twitch. Suddenly Aster growled, thick heat shooting deep inside Jack's stomach. Jack screamed, body convulsing as he came, the two furiously riding out their orgasms. Finally Jack lost all steam and collapsed against Aster. Aster shuddered, and lay Jack down as he pulled out, laying next to him once free. Jack moaned at the felt hot cum dripping down his ass and thighs. It wasn't an unpleasant feeling.

"Oh wow..." murmured Jack, Aster pulling up the silky covers to cover his little lover.

"How's that for yer first?" asked Aster, lightly kissing and licking Jack's face.

"Best I'll probably ever have." He murmured, cuddling up to Aster. Aster rubbed his chin on Jack's head, marking him with his scent. If the damn Groundhog didn't get the message from this, he never would. But, with Jack clinging to him like a teddy bear, it was hard to think of anything but the chilly little show pony sharing his bed.

"Seeing as I plan to be the ONLY you've ever had, that better be the case." Jack laughed and yawned, snuggling deeper, if possible, into Aster's fur. Aster watched those pretty blue eyes close as he placed random kisses on his face, Jack smiling contently as he slept safe in Aster's arms. Aster frowned. Something was jabbing into his side. Careful not to wake Jack he fished out a cell phone. His ears drooped as he saw the ID picture of the person he on the other end.

"Poor little ankle biters." He chuckled, turning the phone off as he prayed the kids hadn't heard them going at it.

Meanwhile, in Burgess, Pippa and Cupcake were snickering.

"I knew Bunny would top." Snickered Pippa, Cupcake nodding as the boys threw popcorn at them.

"STOP!"


	10. Captivation

Jack leapt through the air, laughing as he spread snow over Canada and the northern states. A backpack he had borrowed from North was on his back, carrying the souvenirs he picked up for the kids. He was still giddy from spending the last two nights sleeping with Aster, the two not daring do a thing under Santoff Claussen's roof. He blushed as he thought of the morning after their first time, still mortified and unable to look at North or Sandy.

_ Jack woke to light kisses, getting an eye full of soft grey fur._

_ "Morning Roo." He sighed, peeking up from his comfortable position in the Pooka's arms. Aster licked his nose, making Jack giggle._

_ "Morning Snowflake." He whispered, running a paw down Jack's back. The sheets were only barely covering Jack's hips, Aster's other paw resting half on and half off the swell of Jack's ass. Jack curled back up into the fur, sighing happily as they snuggled together, neither paying attention to the sounds outside the room. Though, in a few minutes they will have wished they had. Jack peeked up, Aster's paw nudging his face up. His lips met furry ones, and Jack merely sighed and melted into the kiss. His joints felt loose, like he was made of Jell-O. It was a really nice feeling. Suddenly a loud bang echoed in the room, the two lovers glancing at where North, brandishing his swords with the obvious physical signs of a hangover, Sandy with his sand trying to pull back North, both in the door while Tooth squeaked about invasions of privacy from behind. Sandy and north had their eyes glued to the bed, and Jack tried to disappear into Aster's fur, the Pooka quickly pulling the covers around Jack. Sandy recovered first, dragging North out before he tried to skin Aster for deflowering Jack and gave them a thumbs up before closing the door. Seconds later they heard a loud bellow._

_ "ASTER!"_

Aster, at the moment, was probably getting some kind of shovel talk. Jack felt bad about abandoning his lover for the fate laid out by North, but he HAD promised Jamie...

Which, speak of the devil, was laying in the snow with his friends, looking completely and utterly bored. Jack grinned, knowing exactly the fix.

Jamie blinked as a snowflake landed on his nose, it's brethren falling softly all around.

"Hey, any of you seen a few kids in need of a good snowball war?" All heads turned to see jack perched on a lamp post, waving coyly at them with a pack of spoils behind him.

"JACK!" Pippa and Cupcake jumped up, the boys turning bright red. Jack, thoroughly confused, floated down, only to be ambushed by Cupcake and Pippa, who were talking a mile a minute.

"Slow down!" said Jack. "One at a time girls! Jamie, what's with you guys? I brought the souvenirs for you guys." That seemed to smooth over whatever issue there was, and after Sophie tackled Jack, the spirit distributed the gifts. Cupcake got a necklace with a carved and painted unicorn, Pippa a necklace with a green hued shell preserved in some kind of resin. Claude and Clyde both got t-shirts that changed color in sun, one of the jungles and the other of the North shore. Sophie got a necklace with small carved flowers in every color imaginable with tiny shells. Monty got a vibrant case of preserved flowers with their genus and name below. Jamie received a book of Hawaiian legends and a supposed map of where each spirit lived. On top of that all got a large lollypop with different pictures of the Hawaiian Islands on edible paper in the flavored sugar shell.

"So, what was with you guys?" asked Jack, completely confused. The boys froze and turned red, while Sophie licked her lollypop, blissfully unaware of the awkward conversation beginning a few feet away. Jack jumped as Cupcake and Pippa squealed, tackling him.

"Details!" they said, eyes practically sparkling.

"Details on what?" Jack was now completely confused, and Jamie smiled nervously.

"Uh...two nights ago, we were watching a movie..." Jack gave him a blank look.

"...Oh god it wasn't that crappy stop action thing, was it? I have NEVER met ANYONE named Elsa thank you very much!"

"So did you and Bunny get all the way to third base last night?!" The look on Jack's face was priceless, eyes going wide as his jaw dropped, staring at Pippa and Cupcake with mixed horror on his face.

"Wh-wh-wh-WHAT?!"

"You must have pocket dialed us, and we...uh..." began Monty.

"You were making out with Bunny!" squealed Pippa and Cupcake. Jack turned the darkest shade of blue possible.

"Y-you-"

"So, how was it?!" asked Pippa, hands clasped together while she and Cupcake sat on his chest. "Come on, details! You can't leave us in the dark after that line! I believe you left off with threat of castration?" Jack sputtered, turning, if possible, an even darker blue. Suddenly Jack stopped, the wind whistling in his ear. He looked towards the woods, squinting to examine the shadows.

"Get home." Said Jack, carefully taking the girls off him. Jamie gave him an odd look, as well as the rest of the children.

"Jack?" asked Sophie, tugging on the hem of his hoodie. "What's wrong?"

"Just get inside." He said. "Stay together and stay in the light." The kids nodded, quickly heading towards Jamie's house, the closest to the park. Jack, his staff at the ready, glared at the glint of gold in the shadow.

"What do you want, Pitch?" he growled. "If you think I'm letting you anywhere near the children-" Pitch laughed, retreating back, Jack following to keep the bogeyman in sight.

"Oh, this isn't about them." He chuckled. "This is about you, or rather, my REVENGE against you, and the Guardians, especially YOU and that pathetic rabbit."

"Like that's going to-" Jack yelled in pain as black sand stabbed into his leg, clawing at his skin and dragging him into the forest, little spikes of black digging into his hand and ripping his staff away, flinging it across the field.

"Jack!" Jack hit the ground as the children barrelled after him, brandishing snowballs and hockey sticks.

"Get out of here!" said Jack, trying to shoo them off as Pitch laughed, Nightmares charging.

"It's been fun, children, but I have a client waiting for the icicle." The last thing Jack heard and saw before the darkness engulfed him was Jamie, screaming his name with his staff in hand.

_**ROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTG ROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTG ROTGROTGROTG**_

"-And you didn't use the condoms!" Aster flinched, ears ringing from North's lecturing. Yes, the jolly Cossack was fine with them being a couple, but apparently he had a more...traditional idea in mind. More like a few YEARS of courting before being left alone without a chaperone.

Well, North's Plan A had just flown out the window, flipping the bird for good measure. Aster sighed, wanting nothing more than to retreat to his Warren and track down the winter spirit. Suddenly a shrill alarm went off in the globe room.

"Bloody-" North and Aster dashed into the globe room to see Cupid, flying around like a mini-fairy on red bull and overall panicking like he had never panicked before.

"Oi, diaper boy!" yelled Aster. "What's got you all-"

"Oh thank MiM Aster!" he exclaimed, buzzing about with a worried expression. "You have to track Jack!"

"What happened to him?!" demanded Aster, North activating the Aurora.

"I was flying over Burgess and those kids he hangs out with had his staff. I saw some nightmares, and I can't help but think something unfortunate happened." Aster had his boomerangs ready in a heartbeat, his ears back and a low growl building in his throat.

"Aster, we must-" North couldn't get a word in as Aster disappeared into a hole in the middle of the globe room. North groaned, turning to Cupid.

"What now?" he asked, waiting for the other Guardians to arrive.

"Hope the bunny doesn't do anything stupid." Sighed Cupid. "He should have waited. Pitch isn't alone." North started, confused.

"Who is Pitch working with?!" asked north, not wanting to imagine the possibilities.

"The Groundhog."


	11. Action

Jack whimpered as pain ripped through his body, the room far too hot for his comfort and, more than likely, good health. His staff wasn't anywhere near, leaving him defenceless. He let out a long breath as he realized just how bad the situation was. It was dark, almost too dark to see, and the walls appeared to be made of…really familiar stone. Jack froze, shock rendering him speechless.

Pitch. He was in Pitch's lair. He was in Pitch's lair, completely defenceless and overheating.

He couldn't deny the tiny bolt of fear running down his spine.

"Welcome back, Jack." Said a silky smooth voice, gold eyes looking out from the shadows. Jack growled, glaring at the bogeyman.

"What do you want, Pitch?" he hissed. Staff or not, he was going to kick Pitch's ass if he got close enough. Pitch laughed.

"It's not what I want, dear Jack." He cackled. "Though this IS a good revenge. Such delicious nightmares to be had…But, I'm merely giving a gift to my newest comrade."

"It's not all bad, Snowflake." Jack started at the familiar voice, his mind begging his eyes to name the sight of the furry brown spirit a trick of the light.

"Hog?! What the Hell are you doing with PITCH?!" Jack froze as he felt furry lips on his, and for the first time he noticed a new silver ring in the Groundhog's eyes.

"Normally, I don't work with filthy animals, but THIS was too good to pass up." Chuckled Pitch. "I wonder…will that stupid rabbit still want you once you've been dirtied by someone else? Pookas were such…POSSESIVE creatures…" Jack shivered as he felt the Groundhog move in for another kiss.

"HELL no fur ball!" Jack cracked a fist against the Groundhog's snout. The beast growled attempting to grab at Jack while he kicked, squirmed and fought.

Heat be damned, Jack refused to go down without a fight.

_**ROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTG ROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTG ROTGROTGROTG**_

Aster sniffed at the air around the dark hole under the rotten old bed. He was picking up three scents; one of them making little sense to the ancient warrior.

Jack and Pitch, but where the Hell did the Groundhog come from? He couldn't help the prickling fear shifting down his spine. Last he checked, the pillock was still under Cupid's influence. His scent paired with Pitch Black's…

Aster refused to think about it. But, while Jack's distinct scent of a crisp winter morning mixed with cookies, sweets, and of course Aster's lingering scent, in the same place as his two most hated beings in the world sent bile creeping up his throat, it also gave a renewed sense of hope in the grey Pooka. His scent was strong. He had to be somewhere in that dark, dank hole. Aster readied his boomerangs, taking a deep breath as he plunged into the dark hole. Nightmares screamed ahead, the light fading into inky blackness. He didn't care who he had to rip to shreds to get Jack out.

He was leaving here with his little Snowflake, and possibly two trophy heads.

_**ROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTG ROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTG ROTGROTGROTG**_

_****_ Jack fought back tears as pain erupted in his hips; blood and cum running down his thighs, pooling on the ground. Pitch laughed maniacally in the background, the Groundhog affectionately nuzzling Jack's neck. Every inch stung and ached, his body covered in black and blue bruises. Scratches bled sluggishly, dark blue dripping slowly onto the ground as Jack's superhuman healing abilities patched up the damage. He looked like Hell, and he knew it.

"This is positively orgasmic." Drawled Pitch with a devious smirk. "The great Jack Frost, reduced to a filthy WHORE. The Guardians will be so DISGUSTED when they find out, especially the rabbit. He'll never want to see you again. That look…your face simply RADIATES defeat!" Pitch laughed and Jack felt white hot rage bubble up from his chest.

"Liar." He said, glaring at Pitch.

"What was-" Jack pushed himself up, his anger numbing the pain.

"You're a liar." Hissed Jack, grabbing the Groundhog's fur and, with a surprising amount of strength, shoving him into Pitch. "And you're wrong. You think a stupid little romp is enough to beat me down? HELL no!" Jack, stepped forward, fists raised. He couldn't do much with ice in here, but he knew he could do some damage with his fists.

Pitch chuckled, black sand swirling behind him. Jack cautiously pulled on his discarded leather pants, watching as nightmares slowly slunk around him.

"It wouldn't be fun if you didn't have any fight in you." He chuckled. Quick as lightning black sand shot from the walls, Jack narrowly avoiding the tendrils. Jack yelped as a tendril caught his right wrist, dragging him to the floor as another tendril wrapped around his left wrist, two more ropes of sand ensnaring his legs. The sand pulled him up and stretched him wide, the winter spirit struggling fighting the whole way. The Groundhog growled.

"This wasn't part of our deal." Pitch snorted, flicking his wrists. The Groundhog hissed as black sand restrained him, rendering him immobile.

"The deal was you work for me, and I get you the Frost boy." Said Pitch with a wicked grin. "But you haven't done my bidding yet. Be thankful I gave you an advance taste." Pitch pulled out a knife, the black sand pinning Jack to the wall.

"Pitch, get the fuck away from me or I promise I will personally drag you thorough the third ice age!" threatened Jack, attempting to kick at the advancing bogeyman. Pitch merely smiled, his gold eyes glittering with cold malice, the knife gleaming like freshly polished silver in the dull light. Jack shivered involuntarily as the knife dragged across his cheek, blood seeping from the shallow cut.

"Tell me Jack." Laughed Pitch. "How much blood can you afford to lose?" Pitch raised the knife, aiming for Jack's left hand, when suddenly a flying blur hit Pitch's bony hand with a crack, the knife clattering to the floor.

"Get yer filthy paws off him!" Growled Aster, catching his boomerang mid-jump, bolting towards Pitch. Pitch picked up the knife and snapped his fingers.

"Oh Hog~" all the air left Aster's lungs as a furry brown cannon ball barrelled into him from the other side of the room, the two crashing into the wall. Aster hissed, ears going flat as he clawed at his opponent, two sets of razor sharp teeth looking for a hold. Aster didn't care about the claws ripping into the skin on his back, only about getting the Groundhog off and getting to Jack. Jack let out a scream as the knife pierced his arm, distracting Bunny. Aster hissed as the Groundhog bit down on his shoulder, kicking his legs out into the other animal's stomach and chest, claws out and gouging into his belly. They two rolled across the floor, biting and scratching, growling and hissing like the animals they were. Blood soaked both pelts, much more noticeable on Bunny, while Pitch continued to cut and stab at Jack.

Suddenly the Hog was gone, the sound of cracking stone filling the room as green tendrils bored their way through, wrapping tightly around the Groundhog and making a beeline for Pitch.

"Stand down Pitch Black!" Bunny had never been so happy to see Mother Nature in his life as the vines shot towards Pitch.

"Stop!" said another voice. North nimbly hopped down into the cavern, swords at the ready. "Get spell off Hog! We go after Pitch!" Tooth screamed in rage as she shredded through the nightmares with her razor sharp wings, North going strait at Pitch. Aster sliced away the darkness binding Jack, thankful that the wounds were already healing. Though, the blood pooling on the floor was a testament to how weak Jack actually was, though he tried in vain to hide it. He was warm and shivering, his face flushed. Normally one would associate it with a fever, but for Jack to be this warm…

He needed out. NOW.

"Oh no you don't rabbit!" Aster held Jack tightly to his chest with one arm, fighting off nightmares with the other. The two were flung into a wall as Pitch got the upper hand on North, all three trapped in a corner as the fearlings moved in.

"FIRE!" Arrows and birds hailed down on the nightmares, a brigade of doves pecking an tearing away at the sand and arrows finishing them off. Cupid flew quickly above the army of fighting doves and Nightmares, grabbing a familiar wooden staff.

"A cold snap would be EXCELLENT right now Jack!" yelled Cupid as he tossed the staff towards the winter spirit. Aster nearly yelped as the body in his arms went from lukewarm to blistering cold, all red gone from his face as his injuries healed with a small sheet of frost stitching his skin back together. His eyes, tired and feverish before, were now sharp blue, like burning ice in a sea of blue flames. Wisely, Aster let Jack out of his embrace, the wind whipping about the cavern like an icy tornado, blowing the nightmares away like dust. Jack turned his angry gaze to Pitch, ice forming on his staff.

"Oh Pitch~" Pitch actually looked scared, his army gone and ally being healed by Mother Nature. "What was that about being defeated?"

"Do the honors mate." Said Aster, ready with his boomerangs. Pitch gulped as Jack raised his staff, ice hurled at him by the wind.

Pitch fell back into his shadows as the ice shards pierced his skin.

_**ROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTG ROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTG ROTGROTGROTG**_

"You shot me with one of your god damn arrows?!" yelled the Groundhog, whit bandages on his arms and stomach where Aster had done the most damage. "You IDIOT! No wonder most of the vacation was a blur and…wait, what the HELL was I doing with PITCH?!"

"To put it bluntly, ya were getting a little too hands on over Snowflake and ended up taking him against his will, but-" snarled Aster, only to be interrupted by Jack, who was snuggled quite happily on Aster's lap.

"You weren't in your right mind, thanks to SOMEONE." Cupid flinched at Jack's glare. "Forget about it. You aren't the first one to make a deal with Pitch. You weren't thinking clearly." The Groundhog let out a long sigh.

"Terribly sorry small stuff." He snorted. "Not gonna solve much, but I regret…doing whatever I did. Damn, now I got to visit that freak fetishist."

"Freak what?" asked Jack.

"Tooth." Said Aster. Jack gave his boyfriend a questioning look.

"Then what's a fetishist?" Aster tried to direct the conversation elsewhere but the Groundhog's loud laugh got Jack's attention first.

Damn.

"I swear to MiM Tooth gets off on shiny teeth." Snorted the Hog. "Count yourself lucky Bunny Foo-Foo only has a thing for body paint. EDIBLE body paint. Ever find the carrot flavor?" Aster's ears went flat against his head, teeth grinding in annoyance. He was about to go knock the Hog' block off when he felt small hands in his fur.

"Kinky." Snickered Jack, tracing the pattern of his markings on his right arm. "I've got a nice little canvas for you if your interested~" Sandy coughed on his eggnog, little symbols flashing over his head, clearly not believing his own ears as Jack giggled and Aster floundered in embarrassment. North crushed his mug handle, poor elf getting a mug to the head, even if he didn't mind licking up the hot chocolate from the floor. A sudden evil laugh startled both lovers, Tooth and a few little fairies holding up camcorders and cameras.

"I wonder how well I could get Cupcake and Pippa to floss for a look at THAT little scene…" she cackled. Jack shot after her, but the fairies were too quick. While he chased them down, yelling at Tooth, Aster felt a crushing hand on his shoulder.

"What This I hear of body paint?" Aster gulped.

No nightmare Pitch could give would ever be as bad as North's shovel talk, second edition.


	12. Completion

Aster slunk out of bed, eyes narrowed and paws grabbing his weapons, was well as a securely locked box from under the bed. Jack slept on, snuggled up in his…_their_ nest, golden dream sand dolphins shimmering above his head. Aster let out a small smile before he slipped on his armor and weapon holster, grabbing the box as he silently shut the door. An evil grin spread on his face as he opened up a tunnel.

So Jack had more or less forgiven the Groundhog. That was his decision.

But who said Bunny was letting him off the hook THAT easily?

He couldn't beat the living crap out of him, under a promise to Jack, but he could still give the pillock Hell. Bunny laughed to himself as he popped up near the Hog's den. He silently opened the box, taking out scentless hair dye, spray paint, super glue, glitter and a box of chocolates. Quick as a bunny he set his trap, and settled the box of chocolate, a little heart shaped box he had lifted from Cupid, with a forged note.

Aster left, the maniacal grin never leaving his face. After a quick run, he made it back to the Warren. Quietly he snuck back into the burrow, feeling quite proud of himself, until-

"Where exactly did YOU sneak off to?" Aster felt like a deer caught in the headlights as Jack, legs crossed and his airborne foot bobbing impatiently, drumming his fingers against his arm, brow raised and looking over Aster with a discerning eye. Aster quickly regained his composure.

"Nowhere special." Said Aster, Jack getting up and walking up to him, wearing nothing but baggy white and blue striped flannel pajama pants and a tight tank top. Jack looked extremely unimpressed with the answer.

"And where exactly is this 'nowhere special'?" Aster gulped, Jack tapping his foot while the cold fire in his lover's eyes slowly grew, icy blue boring into spring green. Aster sighed, preparing to be kicked out of the nest for the night and into the proverbial dog house.

"Alright, ya got me." Said Aster, ears flattening a bit. "Ya made me promise not to beat the crap out of the bloody pillock, so I MAY have rigged his burrow…" Jack looked shocked.

"YOU pulled a prank." He said incredulously. "What kind of prank?" Though confused, Aster responded.

"Chocolate that'll have him Technicolor yawning in minutes, spray paint rigged to fire when ya open the cupboards, neon hair dye in the shower head and taps, and covered his weapons in glue and pink glitter." Jack gave him a long look. Aster was about to snap him out of a trance when a slow smile cracked on Jack's lips. Soon, little laughs broke through, turning into full out hysterics as he collapsed on the floor, clutching his stomach, rolling around while he cackled. Aster, thoroughly confused, merely watched until the giggles became infectious, and soon he had joined Jack on the floor, sides aching with laughter. Their little giggle fest lasted a full five minutes before it wheezed to a stop, sides on fire and lungs struggling for air. Jack had ended up leaning against Aster's chest, the Pooka situated on the floor on his back, Jack being bounced up and down by his fluttering rib cage. Finally the laughter settled into the occasional giggle, the two merely lying on the living room floor catching their breath. Jack sighed and crawled on top of Aster.

"I have trained you well." He snickered, patting Aster's head.

"Since when have ya trained me?" asked Aster.

"Hey, all those times I prank you paid off tonight, didn't they?" asked Jack, smiling evilly.

"I suppose…great inspiration." Admitted Aster, sitting up with Jack in his lap. He shivered at the grin Jack had on his adorable little face.

"Then you owe me." He said, wrapping his arms around Aster's neck.

"Oh do I?" said Aster. "Jack, we-"

"Please?" Aster had no idea Jack could pull of that intense of a puppy dog face, or cry on command, but lo and behold his little snowflake's eyes were going damp, his face morphing into one of, if not the, cutest pout he had ever seen.

"Jack-" Jack ground his hips lightly against Aster's, kissing him lightly on the nose.

"Come on…" he purred. "I feel fine. Any damage done is healed."

"It's too much for ya. After that, anything iffy I could make worse" Said Aster. Jack thought a moment, then a lecherous grin spread across his face.

"Then you lie down, and I ride you." Aster blinked, Jack stripping his pajamas, all while sitting on Bunny.

"Wha-JACK!" Aster moved to pluck him off, but Jack intercepted and pressed himself to Aster's chest, finger tangling in the fur on his chest and shoulders, planting a kiss to his lips while gyrating lightly against him.

"It's a losing battle~" chirped Jack, peppering kisses all over Aster's face. "Sit back, relax, and enjoy your little treat." Aster groaned as he ground down hard, beginning to wake up his cock.

"What are ya-" Aster blinked as he saw a paint brush and a bottle of edible chocolate body paint in his hands. Jack smirked as he squirted a dollop on his thigh and dipped the brush in. He painted little lines of chocolate in a curly frost pattern, putting on a little show for Aster as he circled his pert nipples with the brush, eventually painting on his lips and neck as well as his hips. He set down the brush and grabbed Aster's face.

"Eat me." He said, licking a bit of chocolate from his lips. Aster waster no time, licking away the chocolate trails and nipping at the skin, making Jack gasp and moan. Jack screamed as he suckled a nipple, working it over with his tongue and biting a bit before moving to the next. Jack tugged at Aster's fur as he was moved up on the Pooka, moaning at the feel of his lover's hot tongue trailing over his cool flesh.

"Turn around Snowflake." Growled Aster, nudging his hips. Jack complied, almost yelping in surprise when Aster had him kneel above his head, his face inches from his lover's cock. Without a moment's hesitation, Jack licked the hot length, kissing the length while Aster cursed. Jack squealed as he felt that same hot tongue trail over him, eating him out while he licked and toyed with Aster's own. Jack moaned, wriggling his hips while Aster teased his prostate with his long tongue.

"Mnmm MiM! That's it Bunny." He gasped, pumping his lover while he lapped at the head, occasionally sucking the tip. "Yeah…right there!" Jack whined at the loss of the wonderful appendage inside him, only to have him turned and shuffled back to Aster's hips. Jack nodded, palming his lover's erection before he slowly began to slide down, his muscles giving way like melted butter, but still tight to the Pooka. Jack gasped, whining as he hit his lovers hips.

"Bounce Snowflake." Said Aster. Jack nodded, slowly lifting himself up and slamming back down, making Aster buck into him. Jack squealed, the new position bringing Bunny in deeper.

"Fuck!" he hissed. "Bunny~!" Jack bounced faster, Aster meeting him. Jack fisted Aster's fur, tugging with each thrust. Aster held his hips and increased the pace, slamming in and out of Jack while moving his little lover to the new rhythm, watching Jack drool a bit as he screamed and cursed, cock weeping with each jab to his sweet spot.

"That's it Snowflake." Panted Aster, Jack moving one hand up to play with his chest while Aster bounced him up and own on his fat cock. Aster braced his feet on the ground, gaining better leverage as he pounded into Jack. Jack stopped touching himself, instead holding on to Aster's legs and leaning back, each breath turning into a scream of pleasure.

"Buuunnnnyyyy!" moaned Jack, heat pooling in his stomach. "I'm gonna-FUCK! I'm cumming!" Aster picked up speed, grinning as best he could while Jack let loose, eyes rolling back in his head as he screamed and cried, begging for more.

"Just a bit longer…" he grunted, slamming in hard, feeling every spasm of his lovers muscles. Suddenly Jack threw his head back, screaming as white clouded his vision, cum coating Aster's chest wile Aster filled him up, the harsh vice of Jack's muscles squeezing it all out. The two lay like that a few moments, shaking from their orgasms and riding out the high, until Jack collapsed into Aster's chest, mixing their sticky mess even deeper into Aster's fur and coating his own chest and stomach with it.

"T-told ya." Murmured Jack, snuggling into his Bunny. Aster chuckled, rubbing his love's lower back.

"Ya proved yer point." Said Aster, nodding in good humor. Jack smiled at him and kissed his nose before settling back into Aster's fur. Aster lay still for a few moments, letting Jack catch his breath. Finally, he broke the silence. "So, Snowflake. Ya want a nice bath now to get ya all cleaned up, or do ya want to just go back to the nest?" Soft snores met his sensitive ears, making Aster chuckle. Carefully he pulled out and adjusted Jack, carrying him securely in his arms while he struggled o his feet. Jack refused to let go, even as they entered the nest. Eventually Aster was able to curl up comfortably with his koala of a lover, and he smiled at how cute Jack looked in the after glow. He licked his snowflake's cheek before shutting his eyes himself, his dreams filled with dire humiliation for a certain brown furred nuisance, and of course his little snowflake.

_**ROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTG ROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTGROTG ROTGROTGROTG**_

Aster was humming happily, making blueberry pancakes while Jack took a much needed shower. He had begun the mental count down, and knew any minute the pillock would show up at his door spitting glitter and more than likely an interesting shade of neon something with multiple blotches and an upset stomach.

"RABBIT!"

Right on schedule. The door burst open as a bright pink, green, purple, blue and orange giant groundhog lumbered into the kitchen, most of his fur covered in paint with a bit of the bright pink dye obvious from the waist down.

"Oh, did ya fall in the Rainbow River, root rat?" asked Aster, smirking. The Groundhog fumed, shaking where he stood.

"What the HELL was THAT for?!" he hissed, ready t beat the crap out of Aster if he felt necessary. Aster pressed a kitchen knife to the nose of the Hog, the rainbow animal shivering in horror as Aster sent him the Mother of all 'I-will-smite-you-where-you-stand' death glares.

"Lets be getting this PERFECTLY clear rat." Growled Aster, a dangerous tone in his voice. "I don't want ya touching, seeing, or anywhere NEAR my little Snowflake without supervision." The Hog sputtered.

"I wasn't doing anything to him you idiot!" Aster pressed the knife harder.

"Now, ya DID do something." He growled. "I don't give a shit if ya weren't with it, ya took Jackie without his consent, and ya ripped him up pretty damn badly. Because ya couldn't control yerself, PITCH could have KILLED him. Because of yer selfish bullshit, ya scared a bunch of kids shitless, caused ALL of us a lot of trouble and HURT MY SNOWFLAKE."

"Jack said it himself: he's not holding it against me." Snorted the Hog. "Water under the bridge, all forgiven. Ya wanted revenge, get that stupid cherub! He's the one that shot me in the arse in the first place."

"Oh, he already got his." Growled Aster. "Jack wanted to rip him to shreds! His only saving grace was Tooth. He may forgive ya, but the rest of us won't be any time soon. Consider yerself lucky Jackie made me promise not to eat ya to a pulp, because trust me, ya wouldn't have gotten out of Santoff Claussen alive if he hadn't. Of course…The yetis aren't barred from taking a couple hack saws yer way. Tread lightly, or I'll make ya wish ya were never chosen as a spirit." The Hog gulped, Aster radiating a murderous aura. Sudden laughter burst out behind them, making both animals turn. Jack was at the door to the kitchen, dressed in pajama pants and his hoodie, holding a camera while he nearly died again laughing at the newly colorized groundhog.

"Oh sweet MiM!" he cackled, the Groundhog growling and stomping out the door as the picture slid from the camera. Jack shook it and laughed again, showing Bunny the look of total shock on the Groundhog's face.

"Worth it?" asked Jack, snickering. Aster took the picture and grinned.

"We're getting this copied and framed." Chuckled Aster, the two bursting into fresh peals of laughter. Aster kept one arm around Jack, and Jack wrapped one around Aster, the two laughing at the picture as they sat down to a hot breakfast.

Meanwhile, Sandy was rubbing his eyes, fearing his dream sand had finally done a number on him.

Where he Hell did a heliotrope groundhog come from?!


End file.
